Wednesday, 2 January 2013

On kindness

The nuns had a retreat day a week or so ago on the theme of kindness. Now, in an enclosed order, kindness may be the most important virtue, stemming from forgiveness, that a person may bestow on others. Daily, we sin against each other merely out of our weaknesses and imperfections, not malice. One nun reminded me that the strong in spirit must always be kind to those who are weaker. Seeing myself mostly in the weak category, I realized that any strength I did have was solely from graces. Because I am so pitifully weak, I must rely on God for everything. Any strength I have is directly from trusting completely on Divine Providence alone. Some people hate me and others for this confidence. Seriously, I have met those who want me to be miserable in poverty. I am so sorry for radiating joy in need..not really...I am not sorry. Those in joy irritate the grasping and greedy, who want the joy but not the suffering. I may be on a day-to-day schedule in God's Hands, and I am joyful. To those who want me to be miserable I can only say, trust in God. The joy wells up and overcomes fear. But, this joy only comes with ridicule, criticism, false judgement and marginalization. The crabby ones want me to join in their unhappiness. Sorry, give me the mattress on the floor and a cheerful heart, give me kindness to those who hate and disdain me. You can have it all and have an empty heart. I shall be kind to those in darkness. And, believe me, those in darkness, hate the light.