Three male friends of mine in recent history have told me they are lost vocations.
I tried to comfort their restless souls by explaining that little old me, for one, do not believe in so-called lost vocations.
This entire subject, as you know if you are a regular reader, has been a struggle I have encountered just in the last three years.
Trying to wnter a monastery three times in my life, in three different ones, and failing to make the grade, as it were. I am finally convinced of my lay vocation.
Humbling, yes, as I know and understand in my heart the beauty and perfection of the life of a nun in and of itself. But, being in the world is a humble place. A lay person must seek the life of protection virtually on the battlefield, and not in the trenches. Mother Adele, the foundress of Tyburn wrote that if her nuns followed the Rule of St. Benedict and if they prayed, adoring the Eucharistic Heart of Jesus, they would enter the Unitive State. That the Benedictine life is a short-cut to holiness is true.
I asked Mother General of Tyburn why God would give me such a desire and true understanding of the Benedictine monastic life without giving me the means to do it. She said that God has to answer that question in prayer, as she could not. But, that there is a reason for this desire. The desire to love God totally is the call for all of us.
Practically here last words to me in May were that all of us, even the laity, were called to be Brides of Christ.
As Mother Adele wrote something for all of us:
Do you think a bit too much of your mistakes, my dear little daughter, and under this impression you fall back on yourself and you concentrate in a vague fear and anxiety. Try not to scrutinise yourself so much, my good daughter; immerse yourself in the merciful love of God...Think of him, love him, strive to do everything for him, and little by little, he will attenuate your failures and put in their place in your soul the virtues that he loves. May you always desire to imitate this Divine Model who has said to us through his word and example: 'always do what pleases my Father.
http://supertradmum-etheldredasplace.blogspot.ie/2012/09/mini-series-on-benedictines-two-new.html
The reasons I do not believe in lost vocations may be put into points. How about some blue ink here.
1) St. Thomas More stated that whatever happens is God's Will.
2) God's Will is not clear for some people and that is part of their journey to Him.
3) Humility is found in desiring one thing and being asked to do another.
4) Humility is the basis for perfection and if accepting a life chosen by God even through illness, or lack of stamina, or poor vocation directors, or bad bishops, (as some of my male friends have expressed), or being kicked out of seminary for being too orthodox, and so on, so be it. God's ways are not our ways.
5) Humility means accepting one's role in the Church Militant whatever that may be and that could mean writing blogs, and living in the big, bad world instead of being in a monastery.
6) And, here is a huge consideration. God gave us our talents AND our limitations. We must accept both.
7) No lost vocations, just different ones--the saints are as varied as flowers in a garden. Maybe one has a vocation not to fit anywhere, like St. Benedict Labre, or Blessed Margaret of Castello, saints of the outside.
8) Maybe part of one's suffering, if one does feel like one does not belong in the world, or lay person, is just that fact-living in the world but not being of it-a sign of contradiction in the world felt more keenly than by most lay persons. This could be the cross of one's life, so accept it whole-heartedly.
9) Lastly, self-knowledge is the beginning of wisdom and humility. St. Augustine writes a great deal on self-knowledge and we cannot even begin the road to perfection without begging for this. Here one of his quotations....
I will confess then what I know of myself, I will confess also what I know not of myself. And that because what I do know of myself, I know by Thy shining upon me; and what I know not of myself, so long know I not it, until my darkness be made as the noon-day in Thy countenance.
If one is talking to me about the fact that they are a lost vocation, I can encourage them in looking at what God really wants them to do with their lives. God make new doughnuts everyday.
http://supertradmum-etheldredasplace.blogspot.ie/2012/09/god-makes-new-doughnuts-everyday-relics.html
BTW, my grandma, my mom and I used to make doughnuts at home...great fun.
May I add that we are living in times when the usual rules and ideals on vocations have changed so drastically, that God is pleased if we are true to the Faith-persevere where ever you are.