Most of us have some suffering in our lives. Some have more than others. Cancer, broken marriages, children who have fallen away, financial ruin, and so on are more common than one would like to hear.
But, on top of suffering, God calls us to freely choose penances.
Now, fasting or abstinence of meat on Fridays, and maybe Wednesdays, as well is a good start.
But, I have become more and more aware of the need to take on extra penances.
I talked to a priest about this and he said, "Well, I do not want you standing on your head in a bucket of ice water." The Irish are so cute with words.
But, sometimes small penances are better. I have a few suggestions.
Stop complaining and offer it up for someone. Perhaps, say to yourself- "My friend Sam has cancer, so I shall not complain as a penance for her."
Or give up chocolate for someone who has fallen away from the Church...
Or give up desserts for someone who is blaspheming...
Or give up beer for an alcoholic friend, and so on....
Add small penances to your prayers.
I did something like this for a person who is very far away from God and heard for them the day after I gave up the thing. I had not heard from them for over a year. God-incidence.
Try and do little penances for those you love who are far away from God.