Wednesday, 6 August 2014
Need immediate prayers, please
Within 24 hours of opening up this new computer, I was hit by a huge and horrible virus. This one comes in on Microsoft Updates.
I am in the process of removing, also, the unwanted programs sent to me through the updates.
This is interfering with my ability to blog today.
Readers, please pray for me. I cannot deal with all of this and pray and do my chores. I usually do not spend that much time on the computer, and more time is a cross.
This is the second time my computers got this bug and I blame Microsoft for not having the type of security on the updates.
Again, prayers. I need to do my reading and prayers.
Bye for now....Wednesday noonish...
I am in the process of removing, also, the unwanted programs sent to me through the updates.
This is interfering with my ability to blog today.
Readers, please pray for me. I cannot deal with all of this and pray and do my chores. I usually do not spend that much time on the computer, and more time is a cross.
This is the second time my computers got this bug and I blame Microsoft for not having the type of security on the updates.
Again, prayers. I need to do my reading and prayers.
Bye for now....Wednesday noonish...
Do Not Pretend
When I was in my early twenties, the priest in my parish asked me to visit people in their homes and in the hospital. He was the only priest in a large inner city parish and he was overwhelmed with work. I remember one lady I visited over forty years ago, and today, she came to my mind, as she reminds me of so many people I have met in the past nine months.
The woman was elderly. She was about 75 and fairly housebound, but not physically, only by her emotions. She was comfortable financially, upper middle-class and she was a widow. Her children never visited her, except rarely, as they lived in other states, far away. She was suffering from depression.
Two things I noticed immediately when I first visited her. One was that her hair was always immaculately set. She had this done once a week. The second thing I noticed was that she always held her little white Maltese dog, who was also neatly groomed, when I visited. Some weeks, the dog would have red polish on its "nails" and a matching red bow. While, on another day, the dog would sport a white bow and white nail polish.
This lady, and I shall call her Dorothy, complained about her sad life, her loss of her husband years ago, the fact that her children never came.
I suggested, in my youthful way, that she could join groups, go out, enjoy herself. Money was not an issue.
No, she was too low to go out.
Eventually, in my young state, I lost patience with her one day and said, "Why don't you do something for someone else? Instead of thinking of yourself all the time, why don't you get out of yourself?"
Dorothy became furious. She gave me the list of reasons why she not possibly help anyone. I listened and then I got up to leave.
"I am going now," I said. Dorothy grabbed my hand. "You won't leave me like the others, will you?"
I smiled a rather sad smile. She knew exactly what she had done. She had pushed away love, because it was not the kind of love she wanted. She wanted something specific. She was trying to tell God how to love her. She could not see the Cross as love.
She wanted me and others to love her image of herself she had created. Dorothy was her own idol.
At some point, I gave her a Bible and prayed with her for peace. I suggested she would read the Bible.
She said she would try, but she could hardly read with a dog on her lap, and the dog was always on her lap.
Dorothy had overcome the will of the dog, who just sat there. She had pushed away her family because she wanted something they could not give. She wanted to be a god, or rather, a goddess. She did not know how to love or be loved. Perhaps, she was too full of fear to be "found out" that she, too, was imperfect.
I do not know what happened to Dorothy, as I moved away to another city. The parish priest was moved to another church far away and all contact as lost with the sad, lonely woman.
I see this today, among the old and the young. They want to be loved in a fantasy world. They want to be loved in the image they have of themselves, not in the truth of their being, not in the uniqueness of how God created them.
They want people to love an image of themselves and not really themselves. They want to play God and say, "Love me like this!" These people may even only want a certain type of person to love them, like members of their own families, or people with status, not a young parish visitor.
The dog did not care if Dorothy lied to herself about her selfishness and pettiness. But, God did and God was trying to break down Dorothy's fear of real love.
Sometimes, we are closed to love as we want certain kinds of love and we pretend to be someone we are not. In this state, real love will not come our way.
God waits. He comes to the honest soul, the open mind, the heart which seeks Him. He is not manipulated or overcome like the poor, little white dog.
He wants two things from us. He wants us to know Him, but He also wants us to know ourselves as we really are, full of sin, pride, fears.
He will not leave us unless we push Him away. There are many ways to push God away and one is to avoid suffering. Another is to refuse to accept the fact that only God is good and without Him, we are nothing.
I pray for Dorothy today. She died a long time ago. I hope she became open to love.
The woman was elderly. She was about 75 and fairly housebound, but not physically, only by her emotions. She was comfortable financially, upper middle-class and she was a widow. Her children never visited her, except rarely, as they lived in other states, far away. She was suffering from depression.
Two things I noticed immediately when I first visited her. One was that her hair was always immaculately set. She had this done once a week. The second thing I noticed was that she always held her little white Maltese dog, who was also neatly groomed, when I visited. Some weeks, the dog would have red polish on its "nails" and a matching red bow. While, on another day, the dog would sport a white bow and white nail polish.
This lady, and I shall call her Dorothy, complained about her sad life, her loss of her husband years ago, the fact that her children never came.
I suggested, in my youthful way, that she could join groups, go out, enjoy herself. Money was not an issue.
No, she was too low to go out.
Eventually, in my young state, I lost patience with her one day and said, "Why don't you do something for someone else? Instead of thinking of yourself all the time, why don't you get out of yourself?"
Dorothy became furious. She gave me the list of reasons why she not possibly help anyone. I listened and then I got up to leave.
"I am going now," I said. Dorothy grabbed my hand. "You won't leave me like the others, will you?"
I smiled a rather sad smile. She knew exactly what she had done. She had pushed away love, because it was not the kind of love she wanted. She wanted something specific. She was trying to tell God how to love her. She could not see the Cross as love.
She wanted me and others to love her image of herself she had created. Dorothy was her own idol.
At some point, I gave her a Bible and prayed with her for peace. I suggested she would read the Bible.
She said she would try, but she could hardly read with a dog on her lap, and the dog was always on her lap.
Dorothy had overcome the will of the dog, who just sat there. She had pushed away her family because she wanted something they could not give. She wanted to be a god, or rather, a goddess. She did not know how to love or be loved. Perhaps, she was too full of fear to be "found out" that she, too, was imperfect.
I do not know what happened to Dorothy, as I moved away to another city. The parish priest was moved to another church far away and all contact as lost with the sad, lonely woman.
I see this today, among the old and the young. They want to be loved in a fantasy world. They want to be loved in the image they have of themselves, not in the truth of their being, not in the uniqueness of how God created them.
They want people to love an image of themselves and not really themselves. They want to play God and say, "Love me like this!" These people may even only want a certain type of person to love them, like members of their own families, or people with status, not a young parish visitor.
The dog did not care if Dorothy lied to herself about her selfishness and pettiness. But, God did and God was trying to break down Dorothy's fear of real love.
Sometimes, we are closed to love as we want certain kinds of love and we pretend to be someone we are not. In this state, real love will not come our way.
God waits. He comes to the honest soul, the open mind, the heart which seeks Him. He is not manipulated or overcome like the poor, little white dog.
He wants two things from us. He wants us to know Him, but He also wants us to know ourselves as we really are, full of sin, pride, fears.
He will not leave us unless we push Him away. There are many ways to push God away and one is to avoid suffering. Another is to refuse to accept the fact that only God is good and without Him, we are nothing.
I pray for Dorothy today. She died a long time ago. I hope she became open to love.
Living the Gospel
My new prayer is this. God show me how to love...........(fill in the blank with a name).
Sometimes, people are so closed to love, one just cannot figure out how to love them.
In this younger generation who have stuffed themselves with things and sex, there is a lack of openings to real love. They do not know what love is and so one must pray for creative ways to love.
Now, when one is poor, one cannot go out and buy chocolates or flowers to show concern or compassion or empathy.
Like the Little Flower, who lived the life of poverty in the convent, one must love from the self, as it were. Doing dishes, sweeping a floor, being cheerful, complementing a dinner or comment, being creative in love can be a challenge. Some of those who are closed to love do not want to talk, or share anything about themselves.
And, so, I pray. God show me how to love........Perhaps the answer will be to only pray for that person.
I know, right now, in "my world" two people who have never experienced disinterested, free love. Their entire lives in their families were prisons of expectations, of love with strings attached. These two people, both solidly middle-aged, have never really felt love.
And, they are closed to love, objective, holy love. So, I stop and say, God show me how to love .....
Then, I listen.
Then, I act.
Try it. Stop pretending that you know how to love and let God love through you.
It is the love of God which converts and changes people, not our own limited love.
Finally
If you are frustrated with my long and on-going series on perfection, I highly recommend Ralph Martin's The Fulfillment of All Desire, which I am finally reading. He is not only a true scholar, but a clear writer, making the process of perfection clear to readers.
Now, there is always a little fudge room when examining the lives of the saints. I disagree (humbly) with Martin's excellent chart, believing myself, more in keeping with Garrigou-Lagrange, that the states or stages are more separated and less overlapping.
I do believe, with St. John of the Cross, that one does not sin in the Unitive State, but is tempted, of course.
I have not reached that chapter yet.
One order the book from Emmaus Press. I highly recommend it. I am only on Chapter Four. Many of the sources he uses I have used on this blog. It is refreshing that this man is a lay person, married, with I think, six children. Perfection is for all.
Back soon....
Now, there is always a little fudge room when examining the lives of the saints. I disagree (humbly) with Martin's excellent chart, believing myself, more in keeping with Garrigou-Lagrange, that the states or stages are more separated and less overlapping.
I do believe, with St. John of the Cross, that one does not sin in the Unitive State, but is tempted, of course.
I have not reached that chapter yet.
One order the book from Emmaus Press. I highly recommend it. I am only on Chapter Four. Many of the sources he uses I have used on this blog. It is refreshing that this man is a lay person, married, with I think, six children. Perfection is for all.
Back soon....
Part of The Dark Night
One of the worst parts of the Dark Night is the fact that one realizes one should be damned for one's sins. This awareness of the life of failure to respond to grace, the missed opportunities for growth in holiness, the persistence in habitual venial sin, brings one to almost despair.
One realizes that God was giving grace, constantly wooing one to greater love and mercy, and one just got busy about many things.
I beg God not to stop wooing me. And holiness is not about how many devotions we follow, the length of our prayers or even daily Mass. Our relationship with God must be based on love and love alone.
To be days and nights in the throes of the truth of one's self is painful, indeed. But, God whispers in one's ears-Let me do this. Let me perfect you. You cannot perfect yourself.
And so, the person must stop and answer, Yes, God, do it. Thy will be done.
And, like any sinner, one must endure the undoing of years of sins of omission and commission.
Likewise, especially in modern times, when so many people have not experienced stable, loving families, one must wait for God to heal the emotions.
In the Old Testament, the prophets write about the "healing of rebellion." Rebellion is not only in the will, but in the emotions, in the passions.
To submit to God, letting God be God and truly accepting the Sacrifice of Christ on the Cross as the absolute necessity of one's salvation, are all parts of the Dark Night.
One waits for God, and sometimes, one must chase after Him, calling Him to keep wooing one, and not to give up.
Yes, God does give grace, but He expect us to use it. One of the graces of the Dark Night is to will to trust in the Love of God one cannot see or feel.
Trust can be an act of the will. I shall trust Thee, Lord and I shall love Thee, even though Thou chastens me.
The Dark Night can be like a small experience of hell. One loves as much as one can, even in the darkness.
Like loving a spouse in the will rather than in the emotions, one loves in the will, as the emotions are torn to shreds by remorse and fear.
At some point, perfect love casts out fear. This comes in the Illuminative State.
In the meantime, one waits at the threshold of the House of God.
One realizes that God was giving grace, constantly wooing one to greater love and mercy, and one just got busy about many things.
I beg God not to stop wooing me. And holiness is not about how many devotions we follow, the length of our prayers or even daily Mass. Our relationship with God must be based on love and love alone.
To be days and nights in the throes of the truth of one's self is painful, indeed. But, God whispers in one's ears-Let me do this. Let me perfect you. You cannot perfect yourself.
And so, the person must stop and answer, Yes, God, do it. Thy will be done.
And, like any sinner, one must endure the undoing of years of sins of omission and commission.
Likewise, especially in modern times, when so many people have not experienced stable, loving families, one must wait for God to heal the emotions.
In the Old Testament, the prophets write about the "healing of rebellion." Rebellion is not only in the will, but in the emotions, in the passions.
To submit to God, letting God be God and truly accepting the Sacrifice of Christ on the Cross as the absolute necessity of one's salvation, are all parts of the Dark Night.
One waits for God, and sometimes, one must chase after Him, calling Him to keep wooing one, and not to give up.
Yes, God does give grace, but He expect us to use it. One of the graces of the Dark Night is to will to trust in the Love of God one cannot see or feel.
Trust can be an act of the will. I shall trust Thee, Lord and I shall love Thee, even though Thou chastens me.
The Dark Night can be like a small experience of hell. One loves as much as one can, even in the darkness.
Like loving a spouse in the will rather than in the emotions, one loves in the will, as the emotions are torn to shreds by remorse and fear.
At some point, perfect love casts out fear. This comes in the Illuminative State.
In the meantime, one waits at the threshold of the House of God.
Tuesday, 5 August 2014
Troubles
Go to Fr. Z. for the article today on spies for sermons.
I am trying to figure out how to copy https on this new set-up. Frustrated.
I am trying to figure out how to copy https on this new set-up. Frustrated.
God Makes New Doughnuts Everyday
Well, I got a new computer and it has Windows 8, so I am learning to navigate. Also, everything seems to be through Microsoft.
Did Microsoft buy Skype, btw.
Thanks to H, for whom this machine is now named.
I am glad I can learn new things.
I may ask someone to help me get Office. Is not on here. Please pray about that.
Also pray my friend who has all my files on his hard drive (Thank God, we did this before the other computer died), gets home safely from a trip and helps me put all my stuff back on.
I have "stuff" on three broken computers now. Sigh. I miss my techy sts.
Also, can someone order me a usb 3.0 mouse? Mine is over seven years old.
Ta muchly for thinking of these things for me.
I would much rather just use a pen and paper.....
Did Microsoft buy Skype, btw.
Thanks to H, for whom this machine is now named.
I am glad I can learn new things.
I may ask someone to help me get Office. Is not on here. Please pray about that.
Also pray my friend who has all my files on his hard drive (Thank God, we did this before the other computer died), gets home safely from a trip and helps me put all my stuff back on.
I have "stuff" on three broken computers now. Sigh. I miss my techy sts.
Also, can someone order me a usb 3.0 mouse? Mine is over seven years old.
Ta muchly for thinking of these things for me.
I would much rather just use a pen and paper.....
Today's Gospel
In one of the Gospel's for today, the one for the Tuesday in the 18th Week in Ordinary Time, NO, the apostles are upset because Christ upset the Pharisees.
How many times have you heard, "Tone it down", "You are too zealous" or "These are important people"?
If you have not heard this, you most likely are not living up to your baptismal duties. If you have, you may have answered as Christ does today. He basically states that these false leaders are going to you know where....
How many times have you heard, "Tone it down", "You are too zealous" or "These are important people"?
If you have not heard this, you most likely are not living up to your baptismal duties. If you have, you may have answered as Christ does today. He basically states that these false leaders are going to you know where....
Matthew 15:10-14Douay-Rheims
10 And having called together the multitudes unto him, he said to them: Hear ye and understand.
11 Not that which goeth into the mouth defileth a man: but what cometh out of the mouth, this defileth a man.
12 Then came his disciples, and said to him: Dost thou know that the Pharisees, when they heard this word, were scandalized?
13 But he answering them, said: Every plant which my heavenly Father hath not planted, shall be rooted up.
14 Let them alone: they are blind, and leaders of the blind. And if the blind lead the blind, both will fall into the pit.
From Lauds This Morning
1 Thessalonians 5:4-5 DR
4 But you, brethren, are not in darkness, that that day should overtake you as a thief.
5 For all you are the children of light, and children of the day: we are not of the night, nor of darkness.
Qatar Jet Redirected in GB
http://www.jihadwatch.org/2014/08/uk-military-jets-escort-qatar-airways-plane-to-airport-possible-device-on-board?utm_source=dlvr.it&utm_medium=twitter&utm_campaign=catholiclisa
hoax, but these types of things can be "trial runs".
http://www.theblaze.com/stories/2014/08/05/passenger-video-fighter-jet-escorts-plane-into-u-k-airport-after-report-of-device-on-board/
https://twitter.com/Telegraph
hoax, but these types of things can be "trial runs".
http://www.theblaze.com/stories/2014/08/05/passenger-video-fighter-jet-escorts-plane-into-u-k-airport-after-report-of-device-on-board/
https://twitter.com/Telegraph
Saintly Families
St. Etheldreda, the patron of this blog, was from a holy family. She has many relatives who are saints.
Today is the feast day of St. Nonna, widow, who lived to be 374, apparently outliving her husband by just a few months. Good genes!
Her family is full of saints. Her husband, who she converted, is the great St. Gregory Nazianzen the Elder. Three of her children are saints, including the great St. Gregory Nazianzen and St. Caesrius of Nazianzen. The third is St. Gorgonia.
So, why do some families have lots of saints in them and some have none?
One simply reason-Nonna and her kin wanted to become saints. They prayed, studied, suffered, encouraged each other in habits of holiness. They all had two things in mind-Christ and His Church.
St. Basil the Great's brother was also a saint, and his sister, and an aunt.
Do you want your child to be a Doctor of the Church? Be a saint.
Today is the feast day of St. Nonna, widow, who lived to be 374, apparently outliving her husband by just a few months. Good genes!
Her family is full of saints. Her husband, who she converted, is the great St. Gregory Nazianzen the Elder. Three of her children are saints, including the great St. Gregory Nazianzen and St. Caesrius of Nazianzen. The third is St. Gorgonia.
So, why do some families have lots of saints in them and some have none?
One simply reason-Nonna and her kin wanted to become saints. They prayed, studied, suffered, encouraged each other in habits of holiness. They all had two things in mind-Christ and His Church.
St. Basil the Great's brother was also a saint, and his sister, and an aunt.
Do you want your child to be a Doctor of the Church? Be a saint.
Re-Inspired
Someone yesterday inspired me. You shall know who soon. This person and I discussed briefly "new orders" and "communities".
Remember when I wanted to start the community of Adoration in Walsingham? It did not happen because I could not buy the house, which is now sold.
Communities need places. People need a place to gather in order to worship God. I have been writing about podding and community for a long time.
I am re-inspired to ask if there are any women interested in a community of Adoration.
I wanted this to be in Walsingham, as there is no Latin Mass presence there and I wanted to bring that there. I envisioned lay women worshiping God 7/24. Someone suggested to me recently, a few months ago, that maybe the place was not the right place. Even the nuns of Tyburn do not have a place in Walsingham, although a few orders do have a presence.
Mary appeared in Walsingham, but such a house of Adoration can happen anywhere, almost.
The person who inspired me to think again said that all one has to do is find people who have the same spirituality and the same vision for service.
Adoration is service to the Church. Praying for the Church Militant is a service to the Church. Praying for priests and seminarians is a service to the Church.
The Breviary, Gregorian Chant, and the EF make a spirituality. Adoring Christ is the center of this spirituality.
I shall ask one more time. Are there any people out there interested? Is anyone interested in being a benefactor for a house of Adoration?
Update on The Rant-Becoming Your God
I ranted about the lack of study and the lack of catechesis for very young children in the family.
I have been thinking today as to the depth of the problem of the weakness of our families and, therefore, the Church.
I have come up with the basic truth that the vast majority of Catholics no longer believe in what they do on Sunday.
Sunday Catholics are Catholic for an hour a week and pagan for the other 167 hours. Amazing. One cannot get to heaven with this ratio of thinking about God 1:168.
The problem is that other gods have replaced God, so the name-only, pagan-Catholics are idolators.
What are they idolizing? Money, status, pleasure, self, family, other people....stuff.
Like all people who worship something, idolators turn into what they worship. If one worships money, one becomes the vice of greed. If one worships another person, one becomes the vice of lust, and so on.
Now, if one worships God the Father, God the Son and God the Holy Ghost, with one's whole heart, and mind and soul, there is a good chance that that person will become like God as much as it is possible for that person to do so.
Are you in sanctifying grace or are you in idolatry?
Of course, the truth keeps us humble. We are nothing without the Triune God.
What God are you becoming?
A test:
1) What or who do you think of most of the day?
2) How do you spend your free time?
3) What and about whom do you read daily?
4) On what do you spend your money the most?
5) If you pray, what is the focus of your prayers?
6) Who are your friends? Are they fellow idolators?
7) Where do you go the most, besides work?
8) If you give away anything, to whom do these things or money go?
9) If you work a 40 hour week, what are you doing outside of the normal eight hours times seven days a week, and hours for eating, washing, doing home chores? In other words, what do you do with your "down time"?
10) Saints have little or no "down time".
By the way, we do not know the name of the ancient people of Malta, or any one person's name. But, we know the names of Abraham, Isaac, Jacob, Joseph, and so on. Why? Because the God of the Patriarchs is the Living God. The gods of the ancients were dead stone.
Saints of The Knights of Malta Part Seven
Saint Flora of Beaulieu Virgin.
http://catholic-thoughts.info/saints/Octsaints.htm
Patron of the abandoned, of converts, single laywomen, and victims of betrayal — Flora was born in France about the year 1309. She was a devout child and later resisted all attempts on the part of her parents to find a husband for her. In 1324, she entered the Priory of Beaulieu of the Hospitaller nuns of St. John of Jerusalem. Here she was beset with many and diverse trials, fell into a depressed state, and was made sport of by some of her religious sisters. However, she never ceased to find favour with God and was granted many unusual and mystical favours. One year on the feast of All Saints, she fell into an ecstasy and took no nourishment until three weeks later on the feast of St. Cecelia. On another occasion, while meditating on the Holy Spirit, she was raised four feet from the ground and hung in the air in full view of many onlookers. She also seemed to be pierced with the arms of Our Lord's cross, causing blood to flow freely at times from her side and at others, from her mouth. Other instances of God's favouring of his servant were also reported, concerning prophetic knowledge of matters of which she could not naturally know. Through it all, St. Flora remained humble and in complete communion with her Divine Master, rendering wise counsel to all who flocked to her because of her holiness and spiritual discernment. In 1347, she was called to her eternal reward and many miracles were worked at her tomb
There are more saints from the Knights of Malta Order. One can look at the main site on the first posting for more. Just a taste....
Saints of The Knights of Malta Part Six
from the main site....
http://www.smom-za.org/saints/toscana.htm
In 2003, there was a TLM in her church in Verona
http://www.unavoce-ve.it/fsspx16-02-03-3.jpg
St. Toscana
Religious of the Order of Malta
Memorial: 14 July
She
was born in Zevio, near Verona (Italy) about 1280 and married a man
from Verona, Albert Canoculi with whom she began to do remarkable work
for the poor. After her husband's death, she sold all that she owned and
became a nun in the Order of St. John of Jerusalem, where she devoted
her life to prayer and caring for the sick. She died on 14 July 1343 or
1344.
Prayer:
O God, who
kept your servant Toscana unscathed by the turbulence of this world both
as a wife and as a widow, and made her the instrument in our Order of a
remarkable work of charity for the poor, grant us the grace of serving
you as she did and of pleasing you by our faith and by our actions. We
ask this through our Lord Jesus Christ your Son, who lives and reigns
with you and the Holy Spirit, one God, for ever and ever. Amen.
(From: The Missal with readings of the Order of St. John of Jerusalem of Rhodes, & of Malta, London 1997)
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