I am finishing up this weekend, after a busybacksoon week, Paul C. Vitz' book Faith of the Fatherless. It is a difficult book to read as Vitz is applying psychological insights to the long list of famous, and not so famous, atheists.
If one is not interested in either the personal tales of atheists, or in the relationships between dads and sons or daughters, skip this book. However, if one wants to try and understand one of the many dynamics, which have caused a new generations of unbelievers, this book is superb.
I am at Chapter Six, which is on Autism and Atheism. Vitz is a brilliant psychologist and, in my opinion, a good sociologist as well. The "control group", including saints, provides an interesting view of those who did have either by nature, or grace, or both, a good relationship with the father. One example would be G. K. Chesterton, and another would be Blessed John Henry Newman, who had a a wonderful relationship with his father. Another fascinating person who had an excellent relationship with his father and mother was Alexis de Tocqueville.
The mystery of a boy becoming a man and a girl becoming a woman involves the parenting of strong, Christian fathers, who themselves are obedient to God the Father. This fact must be discussed in Catholic circles, in pre-marriage counseling, in baptism preparation.
A father may be absent in more ways than just death, or because of abandonment. Fathers who work too many hours, or who are away for lengths of time for employment, may also need to rethink the relationship they have with their children.
I know a doctor who works about 16 hours per day, but he always spends time with the children when he comes home, even if he is extremely tired. All his children are practicing Catholics. He has been also very clear regarding discipline.
I find Vitz a compelling author, but one must be in a strong "mood" to read the sad tales of the ruination of lives owing to the bad choices of those suffering from being fatherless.
Of course, grace is stronger than nature, but people make their own choices.
And, as Catholics, we must reckon with the mystery of evil.
One last point which I find interesting is Vitz' idea that atheists create another "god", another source of security to take the place of their fatherless faith. He lists the proclivity of atheists to make science or communism, only two of a long line of false "gods" into the center of their lives. Fascinating.