Friendship in the Lord Part Four

I am concerned about the virtual community members reading the many, many Catholic blogs across the world. I am concerned when people write to me that they are completely isolated in their own areas, in American states, in European countries, in other nations across the globe. These good Catholics, who write to me or even speak with me, tell me that they are the only awake and orthodox Catholics in their parishes, where too many Catholics have compromised their consciences, and where their fellow Catholics are quite open about their disobedience to Catholic teaching. One cannot have friendships in the Lord with those who choose disobedience.

These good, obedient people, who have contacted me, from Australia, from Britain, from Germany, from New York, from Minnesota, and many other places, tell me that they are completely marginalized and alone in their remnant status.

Thinking about this problem and the loneliness of so many excellent Catholics, who are praying and doing penance for the Church, I have come to the sad conclusion that the virtual community, as much as it helps me, fails most Catholics who are on line.

Yes, these Catholics can write to me and Michael Voris, or Father Z., and say, "I am so glad I found you, as I was feeling so alone."

But, the truth is, these good people are physically alone. 

The virtual community has created some real community in some areas. I know this personally and am very glad of this. But, for the most part, those who have sought fellowship through twitter or the blogosphere remain separated from real Catholic community.

This fact not only grieves me, but shows me the depth of the problem of the smallness of the remnant.
When people in large metropolitan areas cannot find respectful, valid, or legal liturgies, cannot find real Catholic schools, cannot find a spouse, cannot find a spiritual director, I am saddened and realize that this situation will spread and become worse.

The isolation of real, practicing Catholics has not changed because of the virtual communities. Yes, we know we are not alone, but like those in Australia who write to me, miles separate people from meeting and becoming real brothers and sisters in Christ.

I have been more fortunate than most, in that the virtual community has brought me great friends and some benefactors. My Christian lady virtual friend who is purchasing bedding for me is one example. Yet, I would love to be in a real, daily Christian community. One reason I have wanted to stay in Europe is that I have found such groupings and miss those friends in Christ deeply.

It takes time to build on the ground, intentional communities. It takes energy. Yesterday, I spoke with a good Christian man who desires community and has lived in a wasteland of liberal Catholicism too long. He wants to pod. I had a note from a good woman who desperately wants community in her area and is praying for a young priest whom she thinks has the capacity to help create such in her city.

But, time is running out in some areas of the world. In America, only one crisis, either man-made or from weather, could shut down all the highways and put the entire nation under travel restrictions. We saw this in New York only weeks ago. Our movements will be curtailed and those who desire real community may never experience such friendship in the Lord.

I have tried for a long time on this blog to encourage community. I have failed in my attempts to inspire people to move, to seek out like-minded Catholics, to truly sacrifice personal comfort for the greater good of a community.

I have a friend who was in a famous Protestant community for most of his life. He told me one time, years ago, that community was very hard, but worth it. He left in order to marry someone outside the community, but the experience of friendships in the Lord mark him as someone who understands the Early Church.

I was in community for seven years. Again, I left it in order to pursue graduate studies and move out into the world, where God was calling me. I do not regret leaving that community so long ago, as that was God's Will for me, but I have never found anything like it in my travels. I also experienced and help create community when home-schooling, and when helping to set up real Catholic schools. It seems that the desire for community was more alive from 1971 to 2001, than now. I hope the desire in some hearts becomes reality.

I know that those in communities will be able to survive, spiritually, in the coming months when the Church faces the biggest challenge since Arianism once the Supreme Court passes same-sex marriage. As an excellent priest told his congregation when Great Britain passed the law years ago, "Your children and grandchildren will face a different world than you have had. You have no idea what is coming."

He was and is correct. The Church in America will split over this new decision. Many bishops will uphold the decision and decide to work with evil. Some bishops will stand up for the true teaching of Christ and His Church and be persecuted. Fines will be followed by church closures, bankruptcies of local dioceses, and the splitting of parishes.

Those Catholics who are isolated now will be more so then. I cannot inspire those who do not see or do not want to move into areas where there are communities already. I have failed in this task online.

Sadly, too many of the TLM communities are under attack or are facing dropping numbers in certain areas owing to changes in priests or the natural movement of people. In some cases, those who are attending the TLM do not want community. I have friends in TLM groups who have been trying to set up communities since before the Summorum Pontificum.  They, too, have failed to inspire others with the vision.

As I go into a place where I shall be more isolated and far from my small communities, from those few I have met who want to build real friendships in the Lord, but who cannot find others who want to do so, I am saddened. But, I must and do trust in Divine Providence.

For those who are succeeding in this endeavor, please write to me on this blog so I can share the good news with others. Some people who have contacted me are willing to move, but do not know where to go.

One of the tragedies has been something I first encountered in 2006, and this is that too many Catholic married couples are not of one mind on this topic. So many wives have told me over the years that they have wanted to move into real communities, but their husbands have not been open to this prospect. That a couple is not of one mind on the building of the Kingdom of God is a tragedy and causes great suffering for those who have had to give up their vision for friendships in the Lord.

The so-called splendid isolation of those who refuse to consider community may be based on fear, selfishness, sloth, or, more likely, consumerism and status. One must die to self to join others in building community. But, in my opinion, community is a necessity, not an option.

Pray for me that I can join those I have friendships in the Lord again. I miss all those with whom I have shared community, J, J, C, C, C, K, S, M, M, S, M, T, D, Fr. C., and others--a remnant, indeed. I pray for you who desire the building of the Kingdom of God on earth.

I pray that those who have hesitated no longer do so but act. I pray for the couples who need to come together in vision. I pray for those single people who have desired lay community life in the great urban ares, in agricultural towns, in mountain villages, and remain isolated with their God. I pray for myself and others who are old and have not found the support they need in parishes which ignore the elderly and shun those who are poor. Pray for me that I can return to "my people".

May all my readers on this virtual community discover or build physical communities before the curtain of darkness falls on our lands.

Psalm 133

The Blessedness of Unity

A Song of Ascents.

1 How very good and pleasant it is
    when kindred live together in unity!
2 It is like the precious oil on the head,
    running down upon the beard,
on the beard of Aaron,
    running down over the collar of his robes.
3 It is like the dew of Hermon,
    which falls on the mountains of Zion.
For there the Lord ordained his blessing,
    life forevermore.

The Universal Church-Friendship in the Lord Two

The Roman Catholic Church has been, for a very long time, called the "one, holy, Catholic, and apostolic Church".  What universal means may be misunderstood by the vast majority of Catholics.

Today, I want to reference the CCC on this point of the Church being universal and what that attribute actually means to the person in the pew.

First, an overview.


811 "This is the sole Church of Christ, which in the Creed we profess to be one, holy, catholic and apostolic."²⁵⁶ These four characteristics, inseparably linked with each other,²⁵⁷ indicate essential features of the Church and her mission. The Church does not possess them of herself; it is Christ who, through the Holy Spirit, makes his Church one, holy, catholic, and apostolic, and it is he who calls her to realize each of these qualities.
812 Only faith can recognize that the Church possesses these properties from her divine source. But their historical manifestations are signs that also speak clearly to human reason. As the First Vatican Council noted, the "Church herself, with her marvelous propagation, eminent holiness, and inexhaustible fruitfulness in everything good, her catholic unity and invincible stability, is a great and perpetual motive of credibility and an irrefutable witness of her divine mission."²⁵⁸


The Church as universal indicates that communities join in this aspect of Catholicity.

What does "catholic" mean?
830 The word "catholic" means "universal," in the sense of "according to the totality" or "in keeping with the whole." The Church is catholic in a double sense:
First, the Church is catholic because Christ is present in her. "Where there is Christ Jesus, there is the Catholic Church."³⁰⁷ In her subsists the fullness of Christ's body united with its head; this implies that she receives from him "the fullness of the means of salvation"³⁰⁸ which he has willed: correct and complete confession of faith, full sacramental life, and ordained ministry in apostolic succession. The Church was, in this fundamental sense, catholic on the day of Pentecost³⁰⁹ and will always be so until the day of the Parousia.
831 Secondly, the Church is catholic because she has been sent out by Christ on a mission to the whole of the human race:³¹⁰

All men are called to belong to the new People of God. This People, therefore, while remaining one and only one, is to be spread throughout the whole world and to all ages in order that the design of God's will may be fulfilled: he made human nature one in the beginning and has decreed that all his children who were scattered should be finally gathered together as one. . . . The character of universality which adorns the People of God is a gift from the Lord himself whereby the Catholic Church ceaselessly and efficaciously seeks for the return of all humanity and all its goods, under Christ the Head in the unity of his Spirit.³¹¹

Each particular Church is "catholic"
832 "The Church of Christ is really present in all legitimately organized local groups of the faithful, which, in so far as they are united to their pastors, are also quite appropriately called Churches in the New Testament. . . . In them the faithful are gathered together through the preaching of the Gospel of Christ, and the mystery of the Lord's Supper is celebrated. . . . In these communities, though they may often be small and poor, or existing in the diaspora, Christ is present, through whose power and influence the One, Holy, Catholic, and Apostolic Church is constituted."³¹²
833 The phrase "particular Church," which is first of all the diocese (or eparchy), refers to a community of the Christian faithful in communion of faith and sacraments with their bishop ordained in apostolic succession.³¹³ These particular Churches "are constituted after the model of the universal Church; it is in these and formed out of them that the one and unique Catholic Church exists."³¹⁴
834 Particular Churches are fully catholic through their communion with one of them, the Church of Rome "which presides in charity."³¹⁵ "For with this church, by reason of its pre-eminence, the whole Church, that is the faithful everywhere, must necessarily be in accord."³¹⁶ Indeed, "from the incarnate Word's descent to us, all Christian churches everywhere have held and hold the great Church that is here [at Rome] to be their only basis and foundation since, according to the Savior's promise, the gates of hell have never prevailed against her."³¹⁷
835 "Let us be very careful not to conceive of the universal Church as the simple sum, or . . . the more or less anomalous federation of essentially different particular churches. In the mind of the Lord the Church is universal by vocation and mission, but when she put down her roots in a variety of cultural, social, and human terrains, she takes on different external expressions and appearances in each part of the world."³¹⁸ The rich variety of ecclesiastical disciplines, liturgical rites, and theological and spiritual heritages proper to the local churches "unified in a common effort, shows all the more resplendently the catholicity of the undivided Church."³¹⁹
Who belongs to the Catholic Church?
836 "All men are called to this catholic unity of the People of God. . . . And to it, in different ways, belong or are ordered: the Catholic faithful, others who believe in Christ, and finally all mankind, called by God's grace to salvation."³²⁰
837 "Fully incorporated into the society of the Church are those who, possessing the Spirit of Christ, accept all the means of salvation given to the Church together with her entire organization, and who - by the bonds constituted by the profession of faith, the sacraments, ecclesiastical government, and communion - are joined in the visible structure of the Church of Christ, who rules her through the Supreme Pontiff and the bishops. Even though incorporated into the Church, one who does not however persevere in charity is not saved. He remains indeed in the bosom of the Church, but 'in body' not 'in heart.'"³²¹
838 "The Church knows that she is joined in many ways to the baptized who are honored by the name of Christian, but do not profess the Catholic faith in its entirety or have not preserved unity or communion under the successor of Peter."³²² Those "who believe in Christ and have been properly baptized are put in a certain, although imperfect, communion with the Catholic Church."³²³ With the Orthodox Churches, this communion is so profound "that it lacks little to attain the fullness that would permit a common celebration of the Lord's Eucharist."³²⁴

Catholicity is the opposite of provincialism. The idea of the "local" church being the only Church came in with the Protestant revolt. One forgets that even in ancient times, the bishop's cathedral was the center of church life, and the rise of pilgrimages added to the sense of unity in catholicity with all Catholics.

Thus, Christendom was born from the real understanding of the unity and catholicity of the Church.

Catholicity and unity are connected. The Protestants do not have unity, nor catholicity-their churches cannot claim such attributes. Too many people have a protestant attitude about their own church experience. They fall into a gross provincialism which excludes the ideal set by Christ of unity with the Trinity throughout the world.

The real Church, the Catholic Church, reflects this unity and catholicity only.

But, this has been forgotten or set aside in America especially, much more than in Europe, where Catholics go back and forth between "national churches", moving out of cultural comfort zones into the reality of the one, true, holy, catholic and apostolic Church.

That Catholics marry outside their national and ethnic groups proves the hierarchy of both catholicity and unity. Our Faith transcends boundaries. What has happened in America is the two-fold resurrection of the heresy of Americanism, discussed on this blog in early days, and the fact that people have separated themselves into groupings which are not Catholic communities.

More on this in Part Three...

813 The Church is one because of her source: "the highest exemplar and source of this mystery is the unity, in the Trinity of Persons, of one God, the Father and the Son in the Holy Spirit."²⁵⁹ The Church is one because of her founder: for "the Word made flesh, the prince of peace, reconciled all men to God by the cross, . . . restoring the unity of all in one people and one body."²⁶⁰ The Church is one because of her "soul": "It is the Holy Spirit, dwelling in those who believe and pervading and ruling over the entire Church, who brings about that wonderful communion of the faithful and joins them together so intimately in Christ that he is the principle of the Church's unity."²⁶¹ Unity is of the essence of the Church:

What an astonishing mystery! There is one Father of the universe, one Logos of the universe, and also one Holy Spirit, everywhere one and the same; there is also one virgin become mother, and I should like to call her "Church."²⁶²

814 From the beginning, this one Church has been marked by a great diversity which comes from both the variety of God's gifts and the diversity of those who receive them. Within the unity of the People of God, a multiplicity of peoples and cultures is gathered together. Among the Church's members, there are different gifts, offices, conditions, and ways of life. "Holding a rightful place in the communion of the Church there are also particular Churches that retain their own traditions."²⁶³ The great richness of such diversity is not opposed to the Church's unity. Yet sin and the burden of its consequences constantly threaten the gift of unity. And so the Apostle has to exhort Christians to "maintain the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace."²⁶⁴
815 What are these bonds of unity? Above all, charity "binds everything together in perfect harmony."²⁶⁵ But the unity of the pilgrim Church is also assured by visible bonds of communion:
- profession of one faith received from the Apostles;
-common celebration of divine worship, especially of the sacraments;
- apostolic succession through the sacrament of Holy Orders, maintaining the fraternal concord of God's family.²⁶⁶
816 "The sole Church of Christ [is that] which our Savior, after his Resurrection, entrusted to Peter's pastoral care, commissioning him and the other apostles to extend and rule it. . . . This Church, constituted and organized as a society in the present world, subsists in (subsistit in) the Catholic Church, which is governed by the successor of Peter and by the bishops in communion with him."²⁶⁷

The Second Vatican Council's Decree on Ecumenism explains: "For it is through Christ's Catholic Church alone, which is the universal help toward salvation, that the fullness of the means of salvation can be obtained. It was to the apostolic college alone, of which Peter is the head, that we believe that our Lord entrusted all the blessings of the New Covenant, in order to establish on earth the one Body of Christ into which all those should be fully incorporated who belong in any way to the People of God."²⁶

Friendship in the Lord

Many years ago, about 1974 to be exact, I remember reading a book by Father Paul Hinnebusch, Friendship in the Lord.

This book is now out-of-print. However, as I was in a lay community for seven years, I learned what this meant from experience and not merely from a book. I think the confusion about lay communities stems from the fact that people have never seen one or read about such.

The Anabaptists, of course, have communities, such as the Bruderhof, and the various Amish and Mennonite communities. These Protestants began their movements as mostly agrarian groups, purposefully separated from urban life, and from the evils surrounding their worlds, such as the compromises made by the Lutheran bishops under Nazism.

Catholic communities, and, indeed, the first communities mentioned in Acts, were urban. It was not until the fall of the Roman Empire that the Church moved out into the countryside. This movement out of the cities, a Catholic Diaspora, helped spread the Gospel, and created the monastic orders, specifically Benedictinism. Recall that St. Benedict's order grew out of the decay following the lack of order after the fall of Rome. His own father was a governor, as the local governments continued using Roman law and order, when possible, even after Rome was ruined.

The combination of law, order and Catholicism created new communities, in addition to the urban ones. It was never the intention of the communities, as seen working in Acts, to isolate themselves from the great cities of the time. In fact, if one also remembers the churches mentioned in the Book of Revelation, one sees that these seven churches were found in the largest cities in the Middle East, especially in the Levant, at the time.

Urban life now seems to be horribly anti-communal, and the suburban life-style, which I never lived, preferring to live in cities, or in towns or villages, dictates against communal life.

I have seen neighborhoods here in New Jersey full of McMansions and no sidewalks. Bedroom commuter neighborhoods by definition are anti-communal.

The strip malls I see here are also anti-communal. One parks a car in front of a store, shops and leaves. There is no place for gathering or even sitting down with friends.

Perhaps this is one reason I love Europe as the smaller villages have community still, and the cities are built on the old communal squares or gathering places. One sees one's friends by walking to church, for example.

Urban sprawl kills communities which existed in older times. For those who are younger than I am, the memory of community simply is not there in the imagination.

We lived in Catholic ghettos, or with other Protestant families who were still having children. People were in each others' houses. Of course, the inflation which hit America in the late 1970s, forced some women to have to work instead of being stay-at-home moms if a certain lifestyle was desired, In my own married life, we chose a simpler lifestyle on purpose in order for me to stay at home and home school.

Such are the choices people make.

However, the ideal of friendship in the Lord, which is found in real communities, seems a dream to many Catholics. Friendship takes time and detachment, and is not based on false, societal class structures, but on the sharing of resources and talents.

Many of us in the community movement in the States now so long ago learned how to have happy, prayerful families. Single people met like-minded single people, which created good marriages based on Godliness and not modern disorders of sex and false romance.

To be in a community meant that those who chose to do so had spiritual direction on a regular basis, and also, the teaching of how to become a servant. In fact, our community had something called "servant school". Dying to self, like those who lived in large families in the past experienced, became part of daily life.

Friendship in the Lord means first of all that one has a relationship with Christ which can be shared with others. and that one wants to live for and in Christ, building the Kingdom of God and not the Kingdom of Man.

Years ago, I had the delight in one college in which I was an instructor, to teach St. Augustine's City of God. This book should be read by all Catholics, and if God allows me some stability, perhaps I can share some of my notes, still floating around my head, with my readers here. At the time I was teaching this book, in the early 2000s, most of my friends were involved in the pro-life movement. Some were even in "rescue".  These people met at each other's houses, including mine, and prayed together, discussing pro-life issues, and the ministries coming out of the concern for pro-life issues.

This group was a small community. We shared dinners, were in each others' houses, and helped each other sharing talents. I was working and homeschooling, and out of this group, I tutored a girl with special needs, whose foster-mother needed help. And, so on.

Out of this group, came homeschooling sharing of talents as well. Many of those involved went to the local TLM even before the Summorum Pontificum.

The group broke up as some of us had to move away for other jobs, one key person moving to California and one going into a convent. However, like my earlier community experience, it was clear that working for the Kingdom of God formed the center of our focus.

Community will be essential in the days which are coming upon us quickly. Those who are strong need to help those who are weak. Those who are weak need to grow and learn to trust in Divine Providence more directly, more intensely.

When I encouraged readers a long time ago to pod, I was hoping that some would see the immediate need for such movements towards community. The time is coming quickly when people will not be able to move into neighborhoods with other Catholics. The time is coming quickly when the isolation of surburbia will become a real prison.

Too many people tell me that they would move into pods but that their spouses do not agree. These couples need to pray together so that one mind can be found on these issues. Women need to learn obedience to their husbands, if their husbands want to take the lead in the formation of community.

Perhaps because my generation came out of big families, where we learned how to share from little on, it was easier than those who have grown up with their own private bedrooms and all the luxuries of middle-class income families. I do not know if that is a problem for some-giving up "individualism" for the sake of the Kingdom.

There is no doubt that the Church grew in persecution because of the communities. That the Holy Spirit left us traces of this history in the Acts of the Apostles proves the importance of communal life.

To be wholly human, one must learn to have friendships in the Lord.

Part One...to be continued

Note from Raissa's Journal Part XXI Perfection Series VIII

In 1931, the Maritains continued hosting retreats for their group of Thomists, at which Fr. Garrigou-Lagrange gave the talks and said Mass.

In this year, about 150 people attended. What struck me about the Journal entry was Raissa's comment that the group was unified in thought and faith and of one mind.

Can one imagine finding 150 Catholics today like this?

I remember years ago when a priest told me that if one got seven Catholics around a table for a discussion, there would be seven different views of doctrine and practice.

Sad days...when I can go for weeks without meeting an orthodox Catholic who is not off in some way either with regard to doctrine, practice, or devotions.

Do you think we shall ever see such unity among the laity again?

Catholic Friendship

The poverty of the younger generations is the lack of the ability to make friends. I am not sure why this is so.
Perhaps it has to do with a thought I have shared on this blog before, which is that people who grow up either as only children or one of two may have trouble making friends.

Part of the problem is the sexualization of relationships, so that people do not know how to be friends, but only sexual partners. This emphasis on sex has caused a great diminishing of the love of friendship in society.

I am not sure. All I know is that there has developed an "idolatry" of the family, again, something of which I have written, an idolatry which denies time and effort needed to build Catholic community, which is built on friendship.

The Europeans are so much better at making friends than the Americans. Most Europeans I have met value family, but also make time for friends. I have been wondering at the difference.

Here are some thoughts on the subject.

One, Americans tend to work too much and therefore, their friends are mostly work cohorts and not friends based on mutual interests.

Two, Europeans have gathering places which are conducive to friendship, such as coffee houses and pubs. Taverns in America do not provide the same ambience for discussion and intense sharing.

Three, families are, of course, valued in Europe, but so are friends. Friends are included in family gatherings and there are overlaps between family and friends.

Four, European men and women do not seem afraid to have close friends of the same gender. American men seen afraid of intimate male friendships. American women do not seem to have those fears.

Five, Catholic men gather for utilitarian reasons but not for philosophical or theological reasons in America. This is not good, as friendship is not merely building houses or doing finances for various groups, but discussing real issues.

Six, friendships take time. Too many people do not make time to cultivate friends. I try to meet my best friend in Iowa at least once a month if not once every three weeks. We have been close friends for eight years, and despite three years apart, picked up just where we left off. This is a test of real friendship.

Seven, good friends bring one closer to Christ and closer to Mary. One must choose one's friends carefully and not settle for false relationships.

More later..

On The Friendship of The Saints

I like St. Martin de Porres, a lay brother of the Dominicans, who, like St. Francis, had the ability to talk to the animals, and these listened!

I like St. Martin as he was a friend of one of my personal patrons, St. Rose of Lima.

My point of this post is that saints need friends. Friendship is a dying art. Too many people look at each other with dollar signs in their eyes, instead of selfless love.

Too many people do not have the proper boundaries for friendship.

Too many people do not have enough personal freedom to allow other such in friendship.

Catholics need friends. Some of us have been abandoned by friends when times get tough. Some people stop being friends when there is nothing to get from the other, so they think. Christ allowed Himself to be abandoned by friends.

But, friendship is a real gift of Christianity to the world.

The first apostles became friends. SS. Francis and Clare were friends. Blessed Pier Giorgio Frassati is a blessed because he knew how to make friends in Christ.

That Martin and Rose were friends comforts me. Can you imagine their discussions about Jesus, Mary and Joseph? Can you imagine them planning to help the poor? Did they pray together now and then?

We need friends in Christ. Recently, I had to say goodbye to two dear friends of mine. One is of an age where I am concerned whether I shall ever see her again alive. We would talk about God and religious things for hours and hours, like SS. Benedict and Scholastic on the night of her death.

Talking about the ways of God and encouraging one another to be saints is what friends in Christ do.

Be a friend and help your friends become saints.

Happy Feast of St. Martin de Porres.