This is why it is important to marry a person who is holy. You will become like your mate.
This is why it is important to think of Jesus and Mary, not one's self or one's enemies.
Forgiveness comes with looking towards Christ on the Cross.
Those who concentrate on the evils of others will become like those people unless a personal detachment or objectivity, the sign of the saint, has occurred. Objectivity demands humility.
Here is a dialogue from Ben-Hur which underlines my point here:
| Photo is not from same scene |
Esther: Oh, Judah, rest. Sleep. For a few hours of the night, let your mind be at peace.
Judah Ben-Hur: [bitterly] Peace! Love and peace. Do you think I don't long for them as you do? Where do you see them?
Esther: If you had heard this man from Nazareth...
Judah Ben-Hur: Balthasar's word.
Esther: He is more than Balthasar's word. His voice traveled with such a still purpose... It was more than a voice... a man more than a man! He said, "Blessed are the merciful, for they shall obtain mercy. Blessed are the peacemakers, for they shall be called the children of God."
Judah Ben-Hur: Children of God? In that dead valley where we left them? I tell you every man in Judea is unclean, and will *stay* unclean, until we've scoured off our bodies the crust and filth of being at the mercy of tyranny. No other life is possible except to wash this land clean!
Esther: In blood?
Judah Ben-Hur: Yes, in blood!
Esther: I know there is a law in life, that blood gets more blood as dog begets dog. Death generates death, as the vulture breeds the vulture! But the voice I heard today on the hill said, "Love your enemy. Do good to those who despitefully use you."
Judah Ben-Hur: So all who are born in this land hereafter can suffer as we have done!
Esther: As you make us do now! Are we to bear nothing together? Even love?
Judah Ben-Hur: I can hardly draw breath without feeling you in my heart. Yet I know that everything I do from this moment will be as great a pain to you as you have ever suffered. It is better not to love me!
Esther: It was Judah Ben-Hur I loved. What has become of him? You seem to be now the very thing you set out to destroy, giving evil for evil! Hatred is turning you to stone. It is as though you had become Messala!
