Blessed John Paul II in his Crossing the Threshold of Hope states this: (Youth) is a time given by Providence to every person and given to him as a responsibility. During that time, he searches, like the young man in the Gospel, for answers to basic questions; he searches not only for the meaning of life but also for the concrete way to go about living his life.
As a teacher of youth for years and years, I knew this. Part of it was my excellent Montessori training, wherein I learned that every person has the desire to create the person he or she is called to be by God, and that we cooperate with that natural instinct. Parents must be clued into this fact and guide their children accordingly, to find and help God in the creation of the adult they will become.
What happened? If we desire to be our own person and to help create that person, what happened to that impetus, which is natural and God-given? To desire guidance and mentoring was a natural phenomenon in the family and in schools for centuries. What happened?
Blessed John Paul II notes that, the fundamental problem of youth is profoundly personal. In life, youth is when we come to know ourselves. It is also a time of communion. Young people, whether boys or girls, know they must live for and with others, they know that their life has meaning to the extent that it becomes a free gift for others. Here is the origin of all vocations....
Wow, so the lack of youth following or responding to the call to the priesthood, the religious life, and marriage is a basic indication of the falling off of facing responsibility and coming into one's own personhood, which should happen at the time of youth.
What happened? Earlier, I wrote that hope is lacking. Now, I see as well, that love is missing.
Think back to your youth. Did you not want to love and be loved? Was there not a natural, even actual grace to want to give of one's self to another, to be committed to something or someone?
A certain energy came from this search for communion, as Blessed John Paul II calls it. The personal fullfillment of the self, albeit by dying to self, gave us energy to seek out ourselves, our talents, our place in society and others, even the “significant other”.
To be in love and to love took up so much time in our youth that when I look back I am amazed we studied, ate, grew physically. But, psychologically, we were healthy in our pursuit of communion. Without the others, we knew we were shrivelled shells, with dried peas rattling around inside of us.
I remember coming across a young girl in my generation and a young man who were afraid of love. To me, this was and is the saddest condition of youth. The young woman, who was beautiful and successful, fell into depression. She was afraid to be rejected and therefore would not go out of herself into the world of love. I wonder what happened to her. She could not face the fear of rejection, so she did not sally forth out of herself.
A young man, again handsome and accomplished, wealthy and full of promise, buried himself in the dreams of others, instead of finding his own self. He was too afraid of love and life to seek out who he was in the world, beyond the safety of a group which was unhealthy and cultic. He could not see himself without the props of someone else's vision. Something beautiful died within him when he was in his twenties. Like the young woman above, I do not know what happened to his soul. He wanted to be correct and right so much, he was afraid of making a mistake for love. He was afraid of what, I wonder? Loneliness, rejection, being wrong...? Love takes chances and youth is the time to do so. How many vocations are lost to fear?
And, can one be afraid of love? Can a young person reject love because he or she fear to be known? To me, this is so sad, as to be known and loved is one of the greatest joys in the world. In fact, in a young marriage, such a joy creates three people-the father, the mother and the new baby. Creation wants to create and love wants to love and be loved.
Somewhere, somehow, some youth lost this ability to want to love and be loved. I say this to them, no matter how old they are now, desire love and love will come to you. He is a Person and He is God, but He uses us all to bring love into this world. Take the chance. Here is my challenge to all, to reach out and be the person God wanted you to be. As Blessed John Paul II said so eloquently, “Be not afraid.”
