Framing Prayer 24-Jesuits and Movement

When I was in a community so long ago now, we were exhorted not to have a caravan, or even a little red wagon, but to be able to move freely, unencumbered to do God's will, The little red wagon represented "stuff", physical objects to which one could be attached and which take time away from prayer and God. Those who read my first blog may remember my article on this many years ago.

I see this daily in the States. Most lay people get too bogged down in things. One needs more than a little red wagon to move one's stuff; to be ready to move implies too much planning and anxiety.

One thing which appeals to me, and I shared some of my recent history on purpose earlier today to make the point, it the Jesuit history of movement. From the very days of St. Ignatius' own life, his travels to the Holy Land, to Paris, to his creation of the greatest missionary order the world has ever seen, one is struck by movement.

While the Benedictines grow in their vow of stability of place, the Jesuits grow spirituality by moving. I hope some of this spirituality rubs of on me.

Movement is the life of the missionary, especially one under obedience. A Jesuit is still told where to go for his ministry-as obedience is a vow taken seriously.

Look at the great missions in Europe. Look at the individual lives of the Jesuit saints. One can hardly keep up with studying their movements, such as St. Edmund Campion's moving from the leafy calm of Oxford to the bustle of Rome at the Venerabile, to the work in Bohemia, and, finally back to England for a relatively short mission and his murder in London at the hand of the Queen's butchers.

Movement marks the North American martyrs, the Asian martyrs, the South American martyrs.

Can we think of another such peripatetic order?

As I sit among the signs of moving, after a day yesterday of moving, I yearn for the stability of the monastery, the cell, but God allows me to go hither and yon with His message of love and freedom.

In order to teach freedom, one must be free, and only the free can move, quickly, peacefully.

When I was in my twenties, a long time ago. I heard that interior voice of Christ say to me "You are like the damsel fly, which moves here and there quickly. I love you for you respond quickly to me."

In my mind I saw the helicopter-like flight of the damselfly, an insect which is highly mobile and can change directions quickly, effortlessly.

One must be detached in order to do this. One must be free. The Jesuit vow of poverty allows them not only to be detached, but to be able to move, now, freely.

In these times, learn to move quickly in God. Listen to His Voice and be obedient to His call.

Learn to change directions, and not begrudge the call of God to leave all and follow Him.

We are all called to be disciples. And freedom marks this call.

I would love a house of prayer in order to contemplative and be a sign of contradiction in this world-a simple place of worship and intercession. But, God calls me forth, still, doing quiet things and remaining free. This is not an easy vocation, but the Jesuit example and prayer method can help me and you, especially in times of upheaval.

Yesterday was the feast day of Saint Kateri Tekakwitha. Without the movement of the Jesuits, we would not have this lovely young saint. A good article is found here on her.

Framing Prayer 22 Jesuits and Detachment

The Jesuits, and the lay order of Jesuits, called the Secular Institute of Our Lady of the Way (Road), take a vow of poverty, as well as the vows of obedience and celibacy.

A hallmark of a true Jesuit, whether priest or lay member, is detachment. Lately, God has been leading me down the path, again, of detachment.

As some readers know, I have things in storage ruined and stolen. Then, I moved my few things,(mostly books and photos of a certain seminarian), into, the house of a friend of mine. After five weeks of feeling a bit "at home" and having some of my little red wagon of things around me, my friend's house incurred a flood. Many things were ruined, including almost 1000 USD worth of books.

As the basement still is wet after two weeks, I had to move my things back into storage, with the chapel things, which I had to wrap up and store.

Sitting in my little room, which is full of my and other people's stuff, (like a real English box room), I pondered the missionary like life of yours truly. Detachment includes, for me, at this time, not having the joy of my things, or the access to my smallish library. Loved icons were repacked, (the ones remaining), and off things went into storage, the great American symbol of our mobile and comparatively wealthy lifestyles. Of course, half the things belong to that certain seminarian in England, but I have not been able to afford to send him his own things.

Detachment means not grieving over soaked and ruined books, It means thanking God for trials regarding possessions. It means realizing that, really, all things belong to God and not me.

All I have are gifts from God, all.

A freak chemical accident of bug spray in the last storage facility ruined some things when the owner had to get rid of wasps. Scarily, the chemical ate through about six or seven boxes, destroying an expensive guilt given to me by the mother of a priest years ago,which I called my St. Therese's quilt, as it was covered with gold roses. That same mother just replaced that for me with a red one. God bless her.

She is as poor as I am and gave her only son to God to become a priest. One is blessed more in friendship than in goods.

But, that is what detachment for the Jesuits, and for us, is all about--priorities and making room in one's small heart for God.

Things cause worry, anxiety, time, space....the lack of things is truly freeing. I think some of the most peaceful days of my lift were those last four and a half years when I lived out of two suitcases and wandered about the West meeting fantastic people and praying.

I wonder is St. Paul had a knapsack or a large duffel bag. St. Ignatius carried practically nothing on his journeys, and was criticized by the Catholics in Paris for his rude clothing. (I look at my old jean jacket and wonder if I should carry this around....as my black jackets are not suited for outside work. I wonder what Ignatius would advise?)

The sadness which I offer to the Lord, and it is not a crushing sadness, is not to have a place where I can again set up the little blog chapel and have the books on shelves.

For now, God denies me this to teach me to be even more detached and to live in greater simplicity.

As I look at the beautiful Our Lady of Mt. Carmel statue given to me by a faithful blog reader, I think of St. Teresa of Avila's well-known story of losing all her things and her donkey in a flash flood when moving from one convent to another. This prompted her famous saying, "God, no wonder you have so many enemies the way you treat your friends."

She shares this incident with us to help us carry on.

St. Ignatius, like St. Paul, after his conversion, went off to pray with practically nothing. St. Ignatius' life was one of a series of trials, failures, abandonment, false accusations, set-backs, illness, and the working out over a relatively long period of time the form of his order. Sometimes people think saints figure out God's Will immediately, but each person has a different path and some are quite rockier than others. I suggest looking at the shorten biography of Ignatius here.

St. Ignatius' life was one trial leading to detachment after another. He worked out his call through the events of his life, as well as through the deep prayers and insights given to him by the Holy Spirit, which make up his Spiritual Exercises.

If St. Ignatius had been attached to home, family, status, fame, things, the order would never have been founded. If he has been attached to his own reputation or false peace among his members, the order would never have been founded.

Many times in his life, he had to decide to plunge forward with the insights given to him by God. He was even examined by the Inquisition, as was St. Teresa of Avila.

We can see that Ignatius, as well as other saints experienced many years of unsettled life.

What kept him focused was, simply, prayer and the evangelical counsels.

As lay persons, one can decide as well, like St. Ignatius, to follow Christ daily despite upsets, and to be obedient to the call of our lives, working out our salvation with the "stuff" of life.

Detachment creates peace and an inner stability.

to be continued..

Finding Things in An Attic

I was helping my mother find some things in her attic the other day, when I was visiting the old house, which has this attic like all attics of those people, who have had interesting lives, and have lived a long time, an attic full of fascinating things. Mother kept asking me if I wanted this or that, and as I do not really want things, unless they are useful, like a coffee pot, or an iron, I said "no".

As I am still, "peripatetic" as I call it, I am not collecting anything more than what I have, barring a few more books some friends are sending me.

The chapel is in the attic of a friend, my books are in the basement of the same friend.  My temporary room is chock-a-block with icons, books, and my suitcases, all my clothes, as well as all my papers which I am using at this time, and photographs.

A tight squeeze...

Attics always have been magical places for children, and I can remember going up into the very hot attic (pre-air conditioning days) and rummaging through Grandpa's books and Grandma's millinery stuff. Four generations of things were in that attic, and more mementoes would be added by later generations.

It was a Catholic attic, with old statues, rosaries, prayer books and missals put into various drawers of various buffets and chest of drawers.

I compare attics with people's memories, places in our selves which like attics that have to be cleaned out, have to be purged of the unnecessaries, and yes, if God so desires, even favorite memories.

The acquiring of both purity of heart and detachment demands purging.

STS and I were discussing one day, how detached we have become regarding things over the years. This, we know, is a particular grace. I could not have been such a free person, moving where God deemed fit, if I had been attached to things.

Most people desire real freedom of spirit, but do not know how to find this freedom.

One finds it in the process of dying to self.

As I sit in my half-storage room, half-bedroom, I honestly can say that I could easily walk away from the things here. What I have I have as a boon from God, but these things belong to Him, not me. Those things which bring me closer to God, I use. Those things which do not bring me closer to God, I give away.

I have nothing, and I am nothing,  This realization is the key to freedom, which can lead to purity of heart.

Love is the key and the answer to the question, "How can I become detached?" When one truly desires only God, to be with Him, to rest in Him, to wait to hear His still, small voice, one is in love.

Love is why I want the House of Prayer---to be in a situation where God is first, and to have others join me in that loving commitment.

I have three ladies who said they would come and pray with me sometimes, and come on a retreat to such a house.

But, like this room, like the attic full of stuff, like the basement with my thirty-nine boxes, this prayer house would not be mine. This would be God's House, and I would merely be the caretaker.

Freedom is a gift of those who chose life over things, God over possession, love over memories.

Today, I was also thinking of Mary in the house of John in Ephesus. Within months of the Ascension, persecution broke out against the Christians. At the latest, in about 44, when James was martyred, John would have taken Mary out of the way of danger. He could have moved to Ephesus as early as the summer or autumn of 33, or in 34, after the death of Stephen.

Mary would have had to leave all her relatives and friends, her things, her house.

She would have been asked to show her love by becoming detached from all the places and things which reminded her of Jesus, her Son, when He walked on this earth.

I did return to where I am staying with some artwork I had given my mother--framed prints over 140 years old, of famous fairy tales from Bohemia and Moravia---things passed down and kept Grandma's attic until she gave them to me, and I had them framed long ago. She wanted me to take these.

I do not want to accumulate things, but as my mother wanted me to take these back, I did so. But, my heritage is larger, more universal than that of my Bohemian, Moravian, and Luxembourg ancestors. My real "stuff" comes from my Catholic heritage, and that is what I share on this blog.

God is in charge of my memory, my understanding, my will.

He is the Master and Bridegroom of the little house which is my soul and my body.

Let me end with the famous prayer of St. Ignatius of Loyola.

Take Lord, and receive all my liberty, my memory, my understanding, and my entire will, all that I have and possess. Thou hast given all to me. To Thee, O lord, I return it. All is Thine, dispose of it wholly according to Thy will. Give me Thy love and thy grace, for this is sufficient for me.

I  never want to have an attic full of things, nor a memory stuffed with so much that God cannot enter in.  His love and His grace are enough for me.

detachment mark two

It is clear we had a robbery. The most expensive things in the storage are gone. I am assuming when the movers moved things from the house to the storage things went missing then. I was already in Europe when things were moved, and all the boxes were marked for overseas shipping, which did not happen because of some circumstances at the US end. I was already in the EU, expecting things, when the arrangements fell through.

I always find it difficult to think of people stealing from the poor. But, sin is always with us and part of the human condition. This is the third robbery we have incurred since 2000. I do not want to share at this time the list of things gone missing, but these were our only valuable, and most valuable items.

However, STS has told me that he is very detached from our things, which is good, as some are now so detached from us by circumstances that we shall never see these things again.

I am reminded of St. Teresa of Avila's famous incident. She was moving from one monastery to another and had her belongings in sacks on the back of a donkey. As the little group was crossing a stream, the water turned into a rushing torrent and took the poor donkey and worldly belongings of St. Teresa far away.

She then uttered her now famous saying, "It is no wonder, God, that you have so many enemies, the way you treat your friends."

She was bolder than I. I have been so humbled by all of this that I am grateful for what I do have, and what can be given back to STS. As it is the 500 anniversary year of the great Doctor of the Church's birth, it is fitting that we think of her today and always, when we need the faith to bear up when there is little consolation.

Still, if anyone wants to help with the books, please do.

Answering Questions from Readers Today

Lord, teach me to be generous.

Teach me to serve you as you deserve;

to give and not to count the cost,

to fight and not to heed the wounds,

to toil and not to seek for rest,

to labor and not to ask for reward,

save that of knowing that I do your will. St. Ignatius 

Before beginning answering some questions from readers on detachment and humility, I have to say that this McDonald's in Springfield, IL, where I am for three weeks, is the worst Macs I have ever been in, worse than Valletta.

Cold burgers, cold fries, the staff cleans with bleach while people are eating and I am allergic to bleach, and the tables are dirty and full of crumbs.

Eiieueue. So part of my detachment is walking to this hole of a place and blogging for you all. I am smiling as I write this, as God uses every opportunity to teach me detachment.

OK, now to business.

Two people asked me questions about how to be detached regarding family, even one's spouse.

Yes, we are all called to detachment, not merely religious or priests. I shall try to explain better what it is as a necessary virtue for all of us.

First a prognosis...and some clarifications

Detachment does not mean that we do not love someone, of course, but it means that we love in Christ, for Christ and for the salvation of that person's soul. It means that we love without any expectations.

Love which is based on sentimentality, on the emotions, on manipulation, but on the will. If one is not willing to love through illness, poverty, even certain serious sins of the partner, one is not detached.

Detachment means that one is free to love.

Examples: I can live with the same peace in abject poverty as in luxury, as I am detached from things.
I am not attached sentimentally to anything, although it has been difficult to get to this point.

People who lost everything in Katrina understand this virtue. What is important are not things. Things are there to use, not covet. When one takes pride in things, one is not detached.

This is clear, but what about detachment in relationships?

Detachment brings about the highest form of love, love for the sake of the other person and not for one's own comfort or needs.

Most families have become idols for those in America, who put family above religion, above, even, the Ten Commandments.

I know a man who fell away from the Church because all the rest of his family met for breakfast every Sunday morning for the entire time Masses were offered. He refused to say no to their unrealistic desires. He would not, then, say no to other unrealistic demands and let himself be manipulated by his siblings. He has not gone back to Catholicism and is getting closer to death.

Another couple who were brought to my attention for prayer a while ago use contraceptives, no allowing God to bring life into their marriage. They are both Catholics, but have put their own comfort and supposed needs before the law of God.

These three people lack detachment, the ability to love family in Christ, putting Christ first, and not their own desires.

In marriage, one must move from romantic love to real sacrificial love. God gives most of us opportunities to do this. One must move to complete unselfishness, without any expectations of return. One must love in the will.

True love from God is in the will, not in feelings or attachments. Those of us who have experienced this true love know that it is possible with God's grace to love freely, peacefully, happily in holy indifference.

Indifference does not mean one does not care. Holy indifference means that one can let go of the past, and the future and live wholly in the present moment.

Is it hard to understand Christ's answer to Mary at the Wedding Feast of Cana? He called her Woman as she represented not merely His Mother, but the Woman who brought the Savior of mankind into the world. If Mary did not have holy detachment, she would not have been able to let Christ go into the world, not seeing Him, knowing that He would suffer. She started His three years of ministry. This event of the changing of the water into wine marked the sign of Mary's complete detachment from Her Son.

She loves Him, more than any human being can love Christ, but she is willing at this point in the Gospel to give Him to the world.

God called Joseph to die before Christ' public work began--and this was a necessity to protect both Mary and Christ from misunderstandings regarding His real Father, God. Joseph had to accept going to Hades and waiting for the Harrowing of Hell, which was accomplished after Christ's Death on the Cross.

Joseph had to be detached in his relationship with Mary, not having normal married relations, which God had called him to give up in choosing him to be Mary's protector. We call this a "Josephite Marriage" and one can read other posts on this.

If a married couple really has trouble understanding this, I suggest they go through the Thirty Day Spiritual Exercises from St. Ignatius. I did this a long time ago and this retreat helped me understand and then try to appropriate detachment.

As to our children. we must not see them ever as created in our own image and likeness, but in the image and likeness of God.

I believe totally that one reason for the lack of vocations is an over-possesiveness of parents who do not want to lose contact with their children. Selfish parents can stand in the way of a true vocation.

I know that giving one's son or daughter to God is a real sacrifice for some. Look at my own life. My son does not and never has belonged to me. I was loaned him for awhile to try and form his in God's image and likeness, not mine. At the right time, God called him from the house and I am fare ortunate if I see him once every sixteen months or more. Such is the sacrifice we must all make for our children.

Detachment is not just a call for nuns, sisters, priests, monks. It is a call for all of us. One cannot love in true charity, in true Christlike love without putting to death attachments to the physical as well as the spiritual life.

Here is St. Ignatius himself on detachment:

In everyday life, then, we must hold ourselves in balance before all created gifts insofar as we have a choice and are not bound by some responsibility. We should not fix our desires on health or sickness, wealth or poverty, success or failure, a long life or a short one. For everything has the potential of calling forth in us a more loving response to our life forever with God.

Our only desire and our one choice should be this: I want and I choose what better leads to God’s deepening life in me.

Basically, I have a rule about things, and then I shall comment more on a rule about relationships.

First of all, if a thing does not lead me directly to God, I do not want it or need it. I use what brings life, not death, to the soul.

My new little mobile chapel is not for me, but for the coming future, for those who will not have churches in their areas when the times come when priests become scarce. I do not need this chapel and am very detached from all the things. I can pray just as well in an empty room, but the chapel is not for me.

I have packed away most things given and have now a bare minimum in the room. Simplicity is best, and less is more.

If I have clothes which I have not used in one year, I give them away. I only have things in storage by an accident of history, as the person who was supposed to facilitate the sending of those things to Europe did not do so, after I was already there.

When I can find someone to help me go through the things, most, if not all, will be given away. I have not been able to get help. I have to even be detached from this fact.

Second point, one must be detached from one's own self. I am sharing something personal to underscore this point. Daily, I am in excruciating pain in my lower back, side and even upper back. Some days I cannot even hardly dress myself. I have problems picking these up off the floor and sometimes I cannot eat for the pain.

But, my body does not belong to me. It belongs to God. And, God has has allowed this pain. I accept this in complete detachment, not able to get the help I need for avoiding this. I accept this situation in complete detachment. When I was in Europe and able to walk daily for miles and lived in places without steps, I did not experience this. But, now, God is allowing this for His Glory, not mine. Detachment for wanting to do things, wanting to be strong and whole allows me to be peaceful.

Third, detachment from family members means this. That one love God first, with one's whole heart, whole soul, whole mind, whole will. One can decide to become detached, but one must also beg God for the grace.

Be prepared, for when one asks for the grace of detachment, God takes one seriously and begins to take away things, people, places.

People, including family members, are gifts in our lives, not possessions. The primary love a husband should have for his wife is that of a brother in Christ. He must ask himself the question, "Do my actions bring my wife and children closer to heaven or not? The same is true of the wife. She must order her day so that she is bringing her husband and children closer to God.

When I was raising my son, his salvation was daily in my mind. I did not want to be in the position of the woman who was severely corrected by St. Padre Pio. Remember, he refused to hear the confession of this woman who had not really repented of her sins in her heart. He said to her and I paraphrase, "I refuse to hear your confession. Your son is in hell because of you."

Detachment prevents this type of sin and selfishness.

Garrigou-Lagrange stresses that we are all called to this type of holiness. The religious life makes it easier in one sense, but not in others. Most lay people would not want the daily disciplined order which is demanded in the religious life.

Fourth point and last for today. Detachment is only possible when one loves God first. Once a person has made God the center of one's life can one experience true holy indifference. One of the holiest lay person I know is a man who is completely detachment from his own needs and concentrates on the real physical and spiritual needs of his wife and children. He has a servant heart. He inspires me.

Pray this prayer from St. Ignatius, and you will find detachment. Feel free to ask questions in the com-box.

Take Lord, and receive all my liberty, my memory, my understanding, and my entire will, all that I have and possess. Thou hast given all to me. To Thee, O lord, I return it. All is Thine, dispose of it wholly according to Thy will. Give me Thy love and thy grace, for this is sufficient for me.

God has asked me to give up family, friends, even my beloved country and continent of Europe. He has asked me to give up health, even the normal comforts most people have in life, such as their own room, their own bed, (I sleep on a floor), and other mod cons. At this point, I only ask for His love and His grace. All I have it God's, including STS. This does not mean that I do not love him, but that I love God and God's plan for him more. I love God and His plan for me more than my own life.

I suppose being in Illinois for the next three weeks is part of this. I was sharing yesterday with two people that I lived in England for a very long time, and the man said, "What punishment is this, what did you do to deserve being stuck here in Illinois?"

Punishment, indeed, but  I laughed. I am detached. Is there suffering with detachment? You betcha, but the more one practices this, the more joy comes to surround one. Do you not think that this virtue will be absolutely necessary in the tribulation to come?

In a direct answer to one person in the com-box, what happens when the other person in the marriage can no longer support you in any way? One still loves, in detachment.

Detachment

Luke 14:2626 “Whoever comes to me and does not hate father and mother, wife and children, brothers and sisters, yes, and even life itself, cannot be my disciple.

Wondering what to write about in my new life as an essayist, rather than a journalist, I decided to begin with an extremely difficult subject for lay people-detachment.

If poverty and being alone with God has taught me anything basic, it has been the virtue of detachment. Detachment must be one of the most misunderstood of all the virtues offered to us by God for the salvation of our souls.

In the history of the saints, detachment runs like a constant theme, from Christ Himself down to the latest canonized saints, such as St. Joseph Vaz, who left his Sri Lankan family to become a missionary and Oratorian priest.

But, what does detachment really mean, besides leaving all to follow Christ, leaving one's family, one's talents, one's prospects in life?  And why is it that so many Catholics struggle with their spiritual life, not looking at the tangles of problems which are caused by a lack of detachment?

I first maintain that one reason why Catholics do not understand or even desire detachment is that they are too influenced by the Protestant ideals of married life over celibacy. Once celibacy is no longer valued in a family or society, the logical result is a lack of celibates. Celibacy demands detachment from family and close friendships.

Many Catholic see this idea as perverse, cruel and even un-Christian, when the opposite is true; that one cannot become a mature Christian without detachment.

The Desert Fathers and the great Doctors of the Church, are quoted by Father Alphonsus Rodriguez at length on the subject of detachment from family and family affairs. In fact, Rodriguez writes that vocations are lost when families demand too much time and attention from those men who are studying for the priesthood. Discipline and detachment must be characteristics of the parents, as well as the adult child who has chosen a vocation to be a priest, brother, nun, or sister.

The tenth commandment condemns the sin of covetousness, and most Catholics think this sin has only to do with avarice, with money, or with lust. However, one may covet one's family ties to the point of putting family before God. I have labelled this in the past as "family idolatry".

In my life, I have seen the great evils of family idolatry, leading to manipulation, a lack of freedom of choice, even spiritual and psychological incest, if not actual physical incest--a hidden sin among Christians of all denominations. I have come to realize that the inordinate number of Peter Pans and Peter Pams may be directly related to possessive parents, parents who do not want their children to become adults, and, therefore, healthy, independent adults.

Coveting not only leads to avarice and envy, but the too common dependency on people for emotional comfort, which some Catholics seem to think it friendship.

The Catechism of the Catholic Church refers to poverty of spirit as the opposite of covetousness. Poverty of spirit demands an objectivity, demands boundaries between friends, even spouses. In our American and Western society, we see an epidemic of false friendship and false love based on a deep drive of self-love, or narcissism, instead of the true dying to self in real relationships. Many people are caught up in not only unhealthy relationships of co-dependency, but unnatural relationships, such as lesbianism or homosexuality, which involve a lack of physical, as well as spiritual boundaries.

We now have two generations, if not three, of children who have been bought love, bribed to love, and not taught to serve in the selfless manner of not expecting anything in return. I recall a man in my parents' life, a friend of theirs, who was always available to help something who had real needs. He was unusual in that his help was completely free of expectations. He honestly did things out of pure charity, with not the slightest desire to be paid back either monetarily or emotionally. His type has almost disappeared from our culture of "you scratch my back and I'll scratch yours" expectations.

Some of us have a gut reaction when we meet someone who has so many unspoken needs that they cannot love freely. Sometimes we call these people "intense". Sometimes we call them "clingy". Our culture has created new dependencies which past generations never imagined. Emotional bondage seems to come with a lack of relationship with God, Who alone can give the love necessary for life.

God demands that we discipline our emotions and put Him first in all things, in all relationships, that we each learn to love freely both God and our neighbors.

But, God calls us Catholics to take a step further. Father Rodriguez notes that once the young man has entered religious life, such as joining the Jesuits, he no longer can be involved in any of the affairs of his family. In other words, as a man totally dedicated to God and God's Church, he is "dead" to his family. God has taught me this lesson the hard way, by letting the work of my hands fail and putting me into extreme circumstances which have forced me to be apart from those I love the most. The reason for this discipline has been to wean me from the strongest loves I have had in my heart, mind, and soul and place in my heart, mind, and soul only the greatest desire to love Him. I honestly can say that I desire little and want to be completely without desire except for God alone.

This is the way of the ascetic. The ascetic flees family and the world not to avoid conflict, or responsibility, but to be alone with God. This desire for oneness with God usually means giving up position, as in status, money, companionship, even natural and good loves. This desire for God does mean giving up wanting to be the one to convert the members of the family who have fallen away, or to be the one who brings fame and fortune to the family. One must die to all desires, desiring only death of self for the sake of finding the love of God in one's own self. He is there, waiting to be found, but so many desires block one's ability to find the God within.

The more one becomes detached, the more experiences true discernment, insight, counsel, (a gift for others), true love, and compassion, being able to suffer with others. Most importantly, detachment brings clarity as to what is love and what is not love. One begins to see one's sins of self-love, desire purification, and want only the suffering which brings one into sharing the life of Christ. Even venial sins reveal a lack of real love and the desire to avoid suffering. Love involves suffering, the dying of self hurts.

Nothing else matters but God. Those who are detached can love in a new way, with the eyes of Christ, suffering with others, but with an objectivity and freedom. To love freely, one must ask God for two graces: one must beg God to love Him, asking for real love. And, one must be humble enough to recognize that without grace, one cannot love anyone, one's self, or God.

Humility is the root and detachment is the stem which flowers into true celibate, Christian love. We must all become celibates in this way-that is, loving with detachment. Celibacy is the natural result of discipleship.

So, why do not Catholics desire this love? One answer-the lack of trust in God. Without a strong reliance on Divine Providence, how can one leave mother, father, brothers, sisters? Christ does not speak poetry in the above pericope, but a basic truth that natural love must be replaced by supernatural love.

But, the call is even more radical. No one can pretend to be a disciple of Christ without this detachment. If one manipulates another to gain love, or tries to buy love, or puts family first before God, one will never become a true disciple of Christ. And, that is what all baptized Catholics are called to be.

Freedom to follow Christ remains within the grasp of all Catholics-all. Freedom to love as Christ loves, without expectation, with the loving and true acceptance of suffering, can be experienced by all baptized Catholics. We have been given the gifts which transcend hurts, failings, even abuse within families. Heroic virtue makes saints. And, heroic virtues grows from the virtues and gifts given to each one of us in baptism and confirmation. We have all we need to be free to really love as Christ loves.

Many, many years ago, God impressed upon my soul this psalm. I had forgotten,until yesterday, this command from God to forget my father's house and follow Him with all my heart and all my soul. In the silence of my day, I seek the Bridegroom Who waits.

When He lets Himself be found, I experience a quiet joy, the joy of being loved by God Himself. I no longer look at me or my faults, as these melt away in the knowledge of being loved. It is only through detachment that God will allow Himself to be found. He is a jealous God, and will not tolerate other loves. If He decides that one goes out and loves others, that is His decision as to when, where, how, and who.

I can hardly wait to rush back to my silent chapel, my place of meeting Love Who waits for a clean heart, a clean mind, a free spirit. But, in this silence, I recognize that God Himself must be the Agent of this cleansing.

The Desert Fathers remind us that some people can be in the world, work with others, marry, have children and be detachment. For some of us, this way of life remains impossible. God creates the person to fulfill the vocation to which He calls that Christian to live. But, the end of all vocations remains the same-complete detachment and a pure love for God.

Psalm 45

Ode for a Royal Wedding

To the leader: according to Lilies. Of the Korahites. A Maskil. A love song.

1 My heart overflows with a goodly theme;
    I address my verses to the king;
    my tongue is like the pen of a ready scribe.

2 You are the most handsome of men;
    grace is poured upon your lips;
    therefore God has blessed you forever.
3 Gird your sword on your thigh, O mighty one,
    in your glory and majesty.

4 In your majesty ride on victoriously
    for the cause of truth and to defend[a] the right;
    let your right hand teach you dread deeds.
5 Your arrows are sharp
    in the heart of the king’s enemies;
    the peoples fall under you.

6 Your throne, O God,[b] endures forever and ever.
    Your royal scepter is a scepter of equity;
7     you love righteousness and hate wickedness.
Therefore God, your God, has anointed you
    with the oil of gladness beyond your companions;
8     your robes are all fragrant with myrrh and aloes and cassia.
From ivory palaces stringed instruments make you glad;
9     daughters of kings are among your ladies of honor;
    at your right hand stands the queen in gold of Ophir.

10 Hear, O daughter, consider and incline your ear;
    forget your people and your father’s house,
11     and the king will desire your beauty.
Since he is your lord, bow to him;
12     the people[c] of Tyre will seek your favor with gifts,
    the richest of the people 13 with all kinds of wealth.

The princess is decked in her chamber with gold-woven robes;[d]
14     in many-colored robes she is led to the king;
    behind her the virgins, her companions, follow.
15 With joy and gladness they are led along
    as they enter the palace of the king.

16 In the place of ancestors you, O king,[e] shall have sons;
    you will make them princes in all the earth.
17 I will cause your name to be celebrated in all generations;
    therefore the peoples will praise you forever and ever.

Indwelling Part Four

I can state absolutely that the biggest blocks to discovering God within are the seeking of comforts and the avoidance of suffering. Once one accepts suffering and stops looking for comforts, one begins to see the light within.

This seeking of either physical or spiritual comforts stops the self-denial of the body and soul. Running away from suffering is the denial of the Cross.

My son told me something a while ago now which resonated with me. He said, "Mother, you got more serious about things after your cancer operation." Such wisdom from a man who observed a spiritual change in his mum when he was 21...

Yes, I did, because I faced death, having had a death experience in a previous operation and realizing that I could very well not make it through another serious one...I detached myself from many things, people, places  even my life, then, but not completely. That is why I am still suffering purgation.

St. John of the Cross notes this, and I repeat the ideas, if not the exact quotations, as there are at least 134 posts on this saint alone.

"If you purify your soul of attachment to and desire for things, you will understand them spiritually. If you deny your appetite for them, you will enjoy their truth, understanding what is certain in them...

How is it you dare to relax so fearlessly, since you must appear before God to render an account of the least word and thought?"

This saint states exactly what St. Bernard does--that one must fight the self daily in order to find God. Sin is merely the replacing of things, people, desires, for the God within.

One must be completely detached from all things, persons, places and self. God is within, but He wants to be found by the pure in heart. That is the end of purification. If one does not do this willingly, God may impose His Will upon us and send us great suffering in order to make one pure.

Even John of the Cross experienced great suffering at the hands of his own community. So did St. Padre Pio. So did St. Faustina. And so on...

St John of the Cross tells us that we shall not advance towards oneness with God until we get rid of ambition, desires, attachments.

But, God wills to be found. He waits within us. He waits for us to love solitude, holy books, meditation, contemplation. He waits until we guard our imaginations, memories, understanding and will to love Him more than anything or anyone else. St. John uses the word "guard", meaning that to pursue perfection, one must be "on guard".  There is, simply, no real rest until heaven.

A hard, but true thought from this saint..."The soul that walks in love neither rests nor grows tired."

We see an agreement here among the four saints mentioned so far, SS. Augustine, Teresa, Bernard, and John of the Cross for the need for purification and perseverance.

Teresa states, “God withholds Himself from no one who perseveres.”  

Augustine writes, "Holy Spirit, powerful Consoler, sacred Bond of the Father and the Son, Hope of the afflicted, descend into my heart and establish in it your loving dominion. Enkindle in my tepid soul the fire of your Love so that I may be wholly subject to you. We believe that when you dwell in us, you also prepare a dwelling for the Father and the Son. Deign, therefore, to come to me, Consoler of abandoned souls, and Protector of the needy. Help the afflicted, strengthen the weak, and support the wavering. Come and purify me. Let no evil desire take possession of me. You love the humble and resist the proud. Come to me, glory of the living, and hope of the dying. Lead me by your grace that I may always be pleasing to you."
Amen.

Bernard writes, 

"But it will be well to note what class of people takes comfort in the thought of God. Surely not that perverse and crooked generation to whom it was said, ‘Woe unto you that are rich; for ye have received your consolation’ (Luke 6.24). Rather, those who can say with truth, ‘My soul refuseth comfort’ (Ps. 77.2). For it is meet that those who are not satisfied by the present should be sustained by the thought of the future, and that the contemplation of eternal happiness should solace those who scorn to drink from the river of transitory joys. That is the generation of them that seek the Lord, even of them that seek, not their own, but the face of the God of Jacob." On Loving God

and John of the Cross, again

"He will be unable to reach perfection who does not strive to be content with having nothing, in such fashion that his natural and spiritual desire is satisfied with emptiness; for this is necessary in order to reach the highest tranquillity and peace of spirit. Hence the love of God in the pure and simple soul is almost continually in act."

The Indwelling of the Trinity is discovered by the pure in heart.

This is our goal, as stated clearly by St. John:

"The very pure spirit does not meddle with exterior attachments or human respect, but it communes inwardly with God, alone and in solitude as to all forms, and with delightful tranquility, for the knowledge of God is received in divine silence."

to be continued...maybe

Detachment Again

A long time ago, I wrote in the perfection series about detachment.

When one truly becomes detached from one's own desires and no longer prefers something to something else, one can finally hear God.

People ask me, "How can I hear God."  I answer, "Become totally detached from everything."

In fact, imperfect love can be a distraction and is a sign of the lack of detachment. One can only truly love a person when one loves that person for the sake of Christ. One has to become detached from affections. One reason why so many marriages fail is the lack of detachment which allows one to love the other in the marriage freely.

This scares people, as they think that detachment means unlove. On the contrary, one is capable of real love, sacrificial love once one is detached. One loves more like God loves.

Too often, people cannot discern, (see my series on discerment), because they are too attached to people, things, places.

How can one know God's Will if one cannot determine what is from God and what is from the flesh, the world, or the devil? One learns how to determine God's working in one's life through detachment.

I write this for four men who are friends of mine and who are struggling with detachment. Not all of them read this blog, but I pray for them and ask that you do as well. They do not mind me referring to them in a general way, as it will help other men discern reality in their lives. These men are called to move on in their faith in a huge and demanding way. Without detachment, they cannot go on to the next stage of holiness to which God is calling them.

The same is true for each one of us. Without detachment even from our own desires, one cannot see what it is that God desires for our lives.

We must be detached so that we can hear God speaking to us in the quiet of prayer, and in the daily movements of the Holy Spirit in our lives.

Repentance and Works

In today's Divine Office, one reads this from Daniel 4:24.

24 Wherefore, O king, let my counsel be acceptable to thee, and redeem thou thy sins with alms, and thy iniquities with works of mercy to the poor: perhaps he will forgive thy offences.

One of the great evils of the charismatic way of "deliverance" has been the confusion about authority, which I wrote about last week, and the ignoring of the life of the virtues.

Too much emphasis has been on "deliverance" prayers and not on repentance. Demons leave those who consistently follow a life of purgation and virtue. If a person who is working on their predominant faults and on venial sin is "oppressed" by demons, it is merely for their further sanctification, or to undermine God's good works. Works is the key word here.

One cannot assume a passive state in spiritual warfare. Too often I have met persons, involved in charismatic ministries, who do not know or believe that repentance is the key to healing.

The confessional can be a place for healing and deliverance. To be prayed over (a bad idea-see my posts last week) for years and years about the same problem may simply be the case of a person not taking reponsibility for detachment from sin.

Detachment for sin is a must for a life of holiness.

Along with detachment, again see last week's posts, is the necessity of almsgiving and works of mercy.

Five people, including one couple, responded to the plea for helping a poor seminarian with blacks requested for use in his EPP year. I have over 2,000 readers per day. In Lent, it seems to me that the ideal of almsgiving, giving without any expectation of receiving anything back, would be foremost in the minds of Catholics. He still does not have all he needs.

"..perhaps he will forgive thy offences."  Part of the humiliation of the king involved him realizing that he had to not only repent from pride, but do good works. Perhaps is the key word. None of us can be assured of going to heaven.

Repentance and working in the life of the virtues go together.

There is a great scene in the movie Becket where the Archbishop is giving away the riches he received while working for the king. Becket claiims that he is enjoying his charity too much. What a grace!

Follow Up from The Perfection Series-ακηδία

Long ago in the perfection series, and in the posts on St. Bernard, I referred to the sin of accidie. Here is the long definition. It is not what people think it is, simple sloth. It is becoming distracted with useless things so that we are taken away from prayer, meditation and contemplation.

Discussing this with a seminarian today, I was struck with the idea that the noon-day devil is not merely low-blood sugar or high-blood sugar before or after lunch, but a demon who distracts us from times of prayer we even schedule.

St. Philip Neri preached that the afternoon in Rome was "the dangerous part of the day", when youth fell into mortal sins of fornication and even gang fighting. ακηδία sets in.

Looking at Psalm 90, one has to reckon with the pleasures of falling into sin and fight these. The noon-day devil is not poetry, but a real demon.

Here is the psalm.

Psalm 90 Douay-Rheims 

90 The praise of a canticle for David. He that dwelleth in the aid of the most High, shall abide under the protection of the God of Jacob.

2 He shall say to the Lord: Thou art my protector, and my refuge: my God, in him will I trust.

3 For he hath delivered me from the snare of the hunters: and from the sharp word.

4 He will overshadow thee with his shoulders: and under his wings thou shalt trust.

5 His truth shall compass thee with a shield: thou shalt not be afraid of the terror of the night.

6 Of the arrow that flieth in the day, of the business that walketh about in the dark: of invasion, or of the noonday devil.

7 A thousand shall fall at thy side, and ten thousand at thy right hand: but it shall not come nigh thee.

8 But thou shalt consider with thy eyes: and shalt see the reward of the wicked.

9 Because thou, O Lord, art my hope: thou hast made the most High thy refuge.

10 There shall no evil come to thee: nor shall the scourge come near thy dwelling.

11 For he hath given his angels charge over thee; to keep thee in all thy ways.

12 In their hands they shall bear thee up: lest thou dash thy foot against a stone.

13 Thou shalt walk upon the asp and the basilisk: and thou shalt trample under foot the lion and the dragon.

14 Because he hoped in me I will deliver him: I will protect him because he hath known my name.

15 He shall cry to me, and I will hear him: I am with him in tribulation, I will deliver him, and I will glorify him.

16 I will fill him with length of days; and I will shew him my salvation.

Here is the definition from Ortho-Wiki.

Akedia (in Latin, accidie) is literally fatigue or exhaustion, but in technical usage refers to the spiritual and physical lethargy which can plague those pursuing the eremetic life. The reference in Psalm 90 (91 MT) to the "demon of noonday" is traditionally identified as akedia. It can take the form of listlessness, dispersion of thoughts, or being inattentively immersed in useless activity.

St.Thomas Aquinas calls it world-weariness, which causes a person to neglect both their physical and spiritual duties. This habit of thinking and feeling is a hard sinful habit to break, but one must do so.

One way to break the habit of negative and depressive thoughts it to constantly praise God all day.

The Office of the Hours is a perfect way to break this habit.

Also, the Chaplet of Divine Mercy, to be said at 3:00, is another way to break accidie.

Listlessness can also be expressed in restlessness, like someone feeling like they "just have to get out" and go shopping.

Accidie may be seen in the need to watch television as well. One breaks a habit of vice by practicing the opposite virtue.

More later...