St. John writes about habitual ignorances and imperfections. These must go, as only the perfect see God. Natural and spiritual imperfections stop the entrance of God in us. He waits at the door, as it were, until we are purified, for that union of love.
However, one good thing which happens is that one's desire to serve God only in all things becomes stronger and stronger in this Dark Night. One yearns for Him more.
This yearning leads one to more frequent confession and more frequent Communion. Daily Mass, if possible, helps greatly at this time, NOT because one is feeling consolations, but because one wants to be with and in God.
My prayer in 2011 was that God would take my little shriveled heart and give me His Heart. My prayers in 2013 have been God take me completely into Yourself and make me into love, and my second prayer has been God, show me my sins and imperfections, all things that keep me from you so the first two things can happen. One's prayers actually become simpler, more basic in the Dark Night because one only has one desire, eventually, when all other desires are destroyed. That is to see and be loved by the Bridegroom.
Now, here is an important point of St. John's which I know to be true.
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| Padre Pio in the Confessional |
One does not experience the freedom, the liberty of seeing in one's life the twelve fruits of the Holy Spirit until one has been purged of all sensory appetites and sensory affections.
Here is a list of those fruits to remind us all what these are: love, joy, peace, modesty, patience, kindness, goodness, generosity, gentleness, faithfulness. self-control and chastity.
St. John means that, again, like a clogged pipe, our hearts, minds, souls do not have the ability to release these fruits. We may have thought we were experiencing these, but if we did before purgation, these were tainted by self-aggrandizement and pride.
The real liberty comes with purity. Then, these fruits are grounded in God's love, in our love for Him and His love for us, instead of self-love.
Real humility in the Dark Night comes when one realizes that one has never really been good, or peaceful, or patient, or kind or gentle or so on.
These fruits come with one's cooperating with purification.
Now, the gifts of the Holy Spirit, received in confirmation, help one get to and through the purgation-remember that these are wisdom, understanding, prudence, courage, knowledge, reverence and fear of the Lord, In the Dark Night, these gifts are enhanced in the infused contemplation.
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| Padre Pio in the Confessional |
One can and must still practice the moral and cardinal virtues at this time, but these, also, are not perfectly experienced in the soul until the Illumination State, when all these virtues, gifts and fruits come into being in real power.
Let us all pray for this journey.
