This post will help with obedience. This is a continuation of a question and comment begun in comments on the last post on home schooling advice. First of all, this author has done a great job synthesizing Montessori on the will.
The will, as Montessori observed, is best divided into three parts.
The first part of the will occurs for the child before three years of age when the child is unable to ‘obey‘ unless what is asked corresponds to one of his/her vital urges. The child is not capable of making a decision to ‘obey.’
The second level of the will shows us that the child can obey when told to do something, and most of the time will in order to please the adult. Many teachers stopped here with ‘blind obedience’. But Montessori believes, we as Directresses, should take the will to the third level.
The third level of the will obedience has been internalized and the discipline has become self-discipline or self-guided. The child sees clearly the value of the obedience. This type of obedience is called ‘joyful obedience‘ by Maria Montessori. With this third level of the will also comes elf-respect and consequently respect for others.
The child then is free to develop within an environment of self-respecting individuals who build a community with one another.
Check this paper out as well, although I have not read the whole thing, there are good sections.
And, as I posted before, here is an outline of deviancie, which must be corrected asasp. Here is the list of deviancies and why from here.
Dr. Montessori classified deviations in two categories: deliberate (adult-fostered) and non-deliberate (those not fostered by adults). Deliberate deviations are caused by the lack of purposeful activities in the home and/or school environment. These children feel the need to be constantly entertained. They are continually bouncing between toys, TV, and computer time to alleviate boredom, but nothing holds their interest for very long. These children may also have the tendency to cling to a parent or older sibling well beyond the developmental plane of letting go. This is because their independence has been denied and they are unable to recognize themselves as a separate person.
There are several deviations that are not fostered by adults and are often seen as "normal" stages of development. Dr. Montessori referred to these as deviations as fugues and barriers (The Secret of Childhood) and deviations that are demonstrated by the strong and the weak (The Absorbent Mind).
- Fugues – A fugue is when a child "runs away" from a task. While they are never still, they lack purpose. They begin a work, leave it unfinished, and rush to another.
- Barriers – A barrier is a deviation which is strong enough to keep a child from engaging in his surroundings. It may be disguised as disobedience or obstinacy. It manifests itself as dependence, possessiveness, power struggles, feelings of inferiority, fear, lying, and psychosomatic illness.
- Strong – Being strong means being able to overcome obstacles. When children are not strong, they are prone to aggression, violence, rage, insubordination. They can be destructive and unable to concentrate. They are termed naughty, disobedient. Dr. Montessori observed that "They have difficulty in coordinating their hands. They are generally noisy, unkind, and often greedy at the table."
- Weak – Children who are demonstrating a deviation in the weak give in to unfavorable conditions. They cry easily, are passive, manipulative, and easily bored. Rather than do something for themselves, they exert effort in trying to get others to do it for them. They are afraid of the world around them and cling to adults
Also read this and this if you want more help with deviancies and order in the home schooling classroom, or serious disobedience.