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Thursday 16 October 2014

Again, more on this blog

The Personification of History and Stella Maris

thanks to wikimedia
I have loved three men in my life. One I was engaged to and did not marry, one I married, and one I was neither engaged to or married.

Now, it has always been interesting to me that these great loves of my life were English.

One, was an English Jewish convert, whose family had been in London since the 16th century. One was descended from the Danes and the Normans from the 8th century and 11th century. The third came from old English stock as far back as the 12th century.

My great love for England and my passionate love for the Faith and the Church in England became focused like a laser pointer in these relationships. 

In each encounter, I learned to love England more and more, as well as loving the person more and more. The blood and bone, soul and mind of these three men taught me to love England and the Catholic Church in England more and more. Each one taught me something new about my own faith as well.

There is no mistaking that this all was part of a plan in God's Mind to keep alive in me a passionate desire to bring others to Christ in England and more so, to strengthen the Church in England in any way that I could. 

My missionary heart and my woman's heart merged into one big flame at these three different times. From the one marriage, came my son, the seminarian, no accident, but a God incident of the first degree.

He is named after two martyrs and a bishop. He is English through and through. He is dedicated to Mary. He loves England, our home.

Now, my love for these men has not faded. It has changed, but love is love, and if from God and not tainted by lust or selfishness, love brings one to God.  Love is the stairway to God. One may suffer loss, but love transcends loss, and becomes the grist of prayer and sacrifice. And, real love of a Catholic sister for her Catholic brothers never ends. It is the love of heaven.

Of course, because of circumstances, I was not allowed to be in these relationships. In each case, my love was not answered with love or constant commitment. In other words, I was spurned.

Today, in Adoration, God showed me that He is in the same position, and let me experience through my very soul and heart a tiny bit of His tremendous love for the laity of England and for the Church.

Christ's love remains unanswered, unappreciated, unrecognized by the vast majority of English men and women. He yearns for His Mother's Dowry to be renewed, strong and pure. He loves England in a special way. Christ will not lead Mary back to England until there is a band of strong men to greet her. Spiritually, we need that renaissance of holy knights.

In my own small way. God has let me join Him in His love--a teeny-tiny way.

But, here is what is absolutely wonderful. God wants the laity of England renewed in order to renew the clergy. Most people think the other way around. No, God wants strong, dedicated, loyal lay people to renew the Church by evangelizing, by creating strong families, by forming saints in the home, by nurturing vocations.

It is not the other way around. God wants to raise up strong men and women to challenge the mediocrity of the clergy in England.

God wants that old Anglo-Saxon and Norman courage, that rich Hebrew heritage, that Danish independence, to stand up and create a new Church, full of traditional Catholics who are leaders.

They are out there. I know some. I have loved some.

God is calling England to renewal right now in the midst of clerical crises.

It is up to the laity to respond, now, and not with arguments or antagonism, but with love and real leadership.

Bede, Anselm, Boniface, Richard of Chichester, Etheldreda, Stephen Harding, the great mystics, came out of the same stock which died at Tyburn. They were formed on English soil by English culture, the English Church.

Where are those courageous hearts now? Where are these daring men and women? Where is the new cloud of witnesses?

Where are the recusants, the remnant?

This is the call of the laity, to keep the Church going in hard times when the clergy is either too weak or decimated by persecution. 

With great love in my heart for my adopted country, which has also spurned me, I pray for the renewal of the recusant heart and mind. I desire so much to help the Church in England. Let Mary come and guide us all again.

Ave Maris Stella, guide us, lead us to forgiveness and light. 

Eden and Gethsemane Five

When God walked with Adam and Eve, God had knowledge of their Fall. He loved them and walked with them knowing they would choose evil over good.

When Christ was in Gethsemane, He saw all the sins of all people of all times. Yet, He loved us all at that moment of intense suffering, seeing all the betrayals and hatred for Him.

The Christ shows us the love of the Father. The Father prophesied the Christ.

Gethsemane is in Eden and Eden, which is the abode of love, is in Gethsemane.

Knowledge is love and love desires more knowledge.

to be continued..

Love this blog...



AP wishes to delay the publication of this video. It will be officially published this Saturday.

Our sincerest apologies.

Stay plugged-in to

for the latest updates from Rome on the Synod.

Good grief... personalism and relativism on Zenit YUK!

Cardinal Kasper: 'Growing Majority' in Synod Support Divorce-Remarriage Proposal
Says Pope Has Problems in His Own Family, Wants to See an "Opening"
By Edward Pentin
VATICAN CITY, October 15, 2014 ( - Cardinal Walter Kasper has said he thinks a “growing majority” of the synod are in favor of his proposal to allow some divorced and civilly remarried Catholics to receive holy Communion.
Speaking as he came out of Tuesday evening’s small working group discussions, the German cardinal said the Pope has witnessed such problems in his own family and that he has “looked at the laity and seen the great majority are for a reasonable, responsible opening.” The Vatican has not denied that the Pope wants such an “opening” in this area.
The cardinal's proposal to administer holy Communion to some divorced and "remarried" couples after a period of penitence has been roundly criticized by a number of senior Church leaders, including Cardinal Gerhard Mueller, the prefect of the Congregation for the Doctrine of the Faith, Cardinal Raymond Burke, prefect of the Apostolic Signatura, and Cardinal George Pell, prefect of the Vatican Secretariat for the Economy.
Cardinal Kasper also discussed his views on the synod, and appeared to suggest that African views on homosexuality -- where the issue remains a taboo -- are not listened to by the Western delegates in the assembly. Noting how “impossible” it is for Western delegates to comment on African issues, he said likewise “they should not tell us too much what we have to do.”

But, Dolan seems to be holding with tradition....

Watch--the tax bit happened before in 8th century Africa....and..

Quotation: "We can have slave-girls in the Caliphate."

Another Hideous Adoration Chapel

The Lord Our God in A Lava Lamp

Avoiding the Millennium Chapel which pipes in New Age music constantly,and has Jesus in a lava lamp behind a common English garden fence, I went to the small Carmelite Chapel in Sliema today. It is horrible. Made out of rough blocks of stone, the chapel is bare except for a huge sunburst made out of metal which is supposed to be the monstrance.

It is awful. Worse than the lava-lamp monstrance...just.

One candle (sanctuary lamp), dying flowers, nothing beautiful and this nod to Apollo,

The Lord Our God in A Clock

I wonder if anyone really understands Who Christ Is and that as the Bridegroom He deserves beauty, not ugliness. How can one pray to Christ in something which resembles a wall clock from the 1960s?

Most middle class peoples' homes here have more attractive living rooms than these two hideous chapels.

Well, tomorrow back to Valletta and the Franciscans....

Compare with the old chapel below, folks.

I mean, who loves Jesus, my Bridegroom? He is not in the desert anymore. He should be honored in beauty and art. Hold on, I am going outside to have a scream! I really do not think these architects and sacristans believe in the Real Presence.

Catholics No Longer Christian?

I am beginning to wonder whether there are any loving Trads out there. If one is not responding in love to those who contradict Church teaching, one will never convert anyone.

And, conversion of souls is our job, not being self-satisfied that we found the TLM and the best blogs, or that we listen to the Vortex, or that we read encyclicals.

Love is not shrill. It is kind and understanding.

This week, I hope to meet a friend of mine who is a practicing homosexual. I like him and want him to convert to the Church's teaching. He was raised Catholic but fell away.

Would I bring him back to Christ by being harsh, shrill, condemning? If he is open, I can speak honestly with him but he must know he is loved and not being treated like a non-person.

Trads, what are you doing on twitter, which I finally left, or in comment boxes when your tone is only condemnatory and not loving?

Yes, and you all know me from this blog that I speak the Truth always, we must speak the Truth.

We must uphold doctrine, the living tradition handed down to us from Christ.

But,in love.

And, long ago, a great spiritual director said this to me. "If you cannot speak the Truth in love, you have no right speaking the Truth."


Feast Day of St. Margaret Mary-Perfection Series VI:IX Reparation

One forgets how young St. Margaret Mary Alacoque was when she died-43-and what sufferings she endured at home before she entered the convent, and afterwards.

Her life would not have been particularly noticed by anyone, as she lived in a family who lost wealth, lived in poverty, gained back some status, and as she was not particularly excellent about her chores in the convent.

Like St. Faustina, St. Margaret seems "ordinary" to the point of being overlooked or suspected.

These are the types of saints God chooses so that His Glory shines forth from such clay vessels. As the Sixth Perfection Series is on Reparation, today's feast is timely.

St. Margaret Mary did make reparation while on earth, suffering not only from her companions in the convent, but from the revelations from Christ, Who showed her His loving Heart, wounded by ungrateful humanity.

Today is Thursday, and St. Margaret Mary asked the Church to sit with Jesus in the Agony in the Garden on this day. How appropriate that my other mini-series is on Christ's suffering in Gethsemane.

When I was growing up in the pre-Vatican II, pre-NO Church, Holy Hours were common. Men coming from work could pop into churches for this devotion.

Even in Malta, it is hard to find Adoration unless one travels. (I do not count the ugly Millennium Chapel with Jesus in the lava lamp--see

Why there is not more public Adoration, I do not know.

Is there any in Walshingham now, regularly? That is what I wanted to set up.

Reparation for ignoring Christ needs to be made now. His Sacred Heart bleeds still. Reparation may be done by us little ones of God.

On Schisms And Your Responses Five

When there is a huge schism, it is as if the entire Church was going through a Dark Night, the purgation of the senses and the spirit.

The Church Militant is in need of great saints-and one must prepare for schism by cooperating with God in the destruction of one's predominant faults.

Saints are in the Illuminative and Unitive States. Do we not need these people now?

Many of my friends are in the Dark Night. No accidents with God--He is preparing them for difficult times.

Take advantage now of daily Mass, if you can, Adoration, Holy Hours, and so on.

You may regret not doing so in the not-so-near future.

On Schism And Your Responses Four

Teach your own children well. Make sure you know if your Catholic school of choice will go with the schismatics.

Even if you lose great financial status, home school.

Your children's souls are your responsibility.

On Schism And Your Responses Three

Knowing where to get the correct news is crucial.

YES to

LifeSite News


Michael Voris

Voice of The Family

Father Z. wdtprs

Crisis Magazine

Salt and Light tv



Catholic newspapers, which on the whole have published inaccuracies, even the Catholic Herald in England.

The main stream media

First Things/First Thoughts, again compromising/pro-gradualism, confused writers

As to EWTN, this organization is getting better but still has not broken with some establishment positions, ignoring the bishops who are openly moving towards schism. EWTN will have to make a decision about the reporting and stands it has taken very soon.

If you want to add to the Yes list or the No list, just comment, please.

On Schisms And Your Responses Two

Several scenarios present themselves to us.

One, you may have to move to a center of orthodoxy. Remember my posts on podding.

Two, you may have to support priests coming into the diocese who are orthodox, like the FSSPs or the Institute. Where liberal bishops have not given permission for these orders to come into a diocese, there will be great suffering on the part of the laity.

Three, you may have to find some older, retired priest who is orthodox and ask his to say Mass in a home church is ALL the priests and bishop in your diocese go over to the dark side.

Four, you will lose friends and even have family members against you. This is inevitable and Christ warned us of this.

Do not pretend these options are easy or possible. One may end up with a schismatic parish, and then you must decide what to do. Sadly, what I see is that too many really good orthodox Catholics have waited too long to pod and move into conservative, orthodox areas.

I cannot say more about that, as you have all my posts on community from last year on line.

Five, if your bishop is orthodox, praise God and be open to having people move in with you in order to save their souls.

Be open.

On Schisms Again And Your Responses One

One must be prepared for schism openly in one's own parish.

Someone wrote to me about this happening already. In other words, the machinations of the liberals in Rome have emboldened some priests to "come out" as heretics regarding ssm, divorce and Communion without annulment and other such false teachings.

The first recourse one has is to write to one's bishop. Then, if that does not work in stopping false preaching and teaching, one must write to the national representative from Rome, be it an apostolic vicar, apostolic delegate or apostolic nuncio. If one does not get an answer, one must write to Rome.

And, if the priest remains unrepentant and continues to be schismatic in all but name, one must find another parish.

This will cause suffering for many families, but one cannot stay in such a parish.

This type of thing happened before in the terrible chaos caused by the Arians and Gnostics during those heresies, when such cities as Alexandria and Antioch, and other places in Egypt and Syria went over to false leaders. Arius, remember, was Bishop of Nicomedia while Athanasius was a lowly and very young deacon at the beginning of the controversy.

The Church was being beset by Donatism as well as Gnosticism and Arianism. Much like today, the heresies were located in certain dioceses because of the infection of the bishops who held these false ideas as against Rome. Remember also that at one time, Athanasius was banished to Trier for 18 months on false personal charges. Some bishops vacillated back and forth, sometimes supporting Arius and sometimes Rome.

Does this sound familiar?

At that time, the emperors got involved, and depending on the emperor (or empress) banished the "good guys" and supported the "bad guys". Hilary of Poitiers and Eusebius of Vercellae were two who had been banished for holding the Nicene Creed, but they were supported by the great St. Basil, St. Gregory of Nyssa and St. Gregory of Nazianzus. St. Cyril of Jersusalem also was a strong, open supporter of the truth concerning Christ, consubstantial with the Father.

Times of heresies create saints as well as heseriarchs.

We are seeing the open battles now and will see worse.

How those Catholics in the large cities which went over to false teaching survived is a question we must all ask ourselves.

Imagine, for example, most of the parishes in Boston, New York City and Washington D.C. breaking from Rome over ssm, divorce and Communion and so on.

What would you do?

You, dear readers, need to start asking yourselves these types of questions.

Follow this site during the synod as well

And, yet another poem of place repost

The Sleeping Lady of Malta

Thanks to Wiki for The Sleeping Lady of Malta, circa 1,500 BC

Of what does she dream, this heavy lady of Malta, resting on her hard bed,
hand under her head, like a goddess taking a break from listening to her votaries singing chants over the wine-dark sea?

Does she dream, or is her sleep dreamless, that of the dead, who no longer hold imagination or memory? Has she let go of the last images of the Middle Sea's ships bringing her necklaces of shells from Syracuse?
Is her dream one of the dancing star-skirted lady?

Did her dreams end abruptly, like one caught off-guard in the night, facing a soft journey into eternity?
Or, is she still dreaming, holding on to images which she creates for the people of Malta, who no longer know her name?

This lady wears the billowing skirts of many goddesses and reveals her breasts to the world, as if to say she is worthy of the worship from those who need fertility.
Those yearnings of Maltese maidens lie in the dust of ─Žal-Saflieni-few want offspring now.

This lady's hair was done by one of the ancestor's of the blow-dry experts of Valletta, and she does not worry about her bare feet, so broken, so lost in memory. Does she does dream of some one, some god beyond the walls of Athens or Kedash?

Does he dream of her, he, buried in a cave or sandstorm, with his arm under his head? Or did he find a lissome lass of Dalmanutha or the ancient springs of Achsah? Maybe he preferred dark, like the tents of Kedar?

His left arm is under my head and his right arm embraces me. Daughters of Jerusalem,
I charge you: Do not arouse or awaken love until it so desires. And, so, perhaps, she sleeps into
this tumultuous century, dreaming of lost love....

copyright 2013 

More of my poetry of place

Friday, 8 November 2013

Poetry from Malta

Autumn and a Lady in Malta

There are no falling leaves here
Desert plants do not acknowledge
Autumn nor reveal the pains of

Yet, autumn it is, despite oleander
And cacti; the sunshine mocks
Those who are in mourning, those
Who do not come to these isles.

A woman sits in a darkened room,
With faded rose and pale green
Chairs, her head in black, her
Dress, black, and as the Irish

Companioni exclaimed, loudly, “I see
You are in mourning.” The black-
Laced lady is in mourning, and wears
A bishop’s ring, not noticing it

In her darkness.  Mysterious loss,
Hidden in time and memory, and
Memory she must deny, move on
As the Virgin Queen said to her

Executed lovers. No discussion, no
Tears are allowed in this hot country,
Where feelings fall like leaves in
Colder countries, but blow away

As fast, as if once seen in oranges,
Yellows and reds, now purposefully
Ignored. No country for old men
Or old women, just kind children.

The lady in lace, surrounded by
Grayness, knows now she is alone,
Like so many other women of her
Age and status. The curse of widows

Is that all seem to think that memories
Sooth, coddle, sustain, but that would
Be madness, not reality. She knows
This truth and knows she is alone with

No Ulysses desiring her after twenty years
Absence; no Orpheus willing to go into
Hades to rescue her from the fading fires.
No one but the New God, to Whom she

Turns. but when she turns, she sees
Only the painted Baroque cross.  This is her
Way now, and in the darkness, she
Acquiesces, joining with the Sorrowful

Madre.  Life was offered and she chose
Life, never death, for she knows the
Plant must die in order for new seeds
To grow; so she waits, in the land of in-

Between, like a holding area in an
Airport, she waits, like a child in
The care of a Father who allowed
His Own Beloved Son to die.

She takes her mourning memories, pressed
Like violets in the family bible, and puts
Them in her amethyst ring, symbol of
Lost power and lost tradition. She does not weep.

Another Poem of Place by Me

Soul Propriete No. 3

As I stand at the large, half-opened window in the convent,
facing ancient bits of walls and new Victorian additions,
the voice of some clerk in London, whose duty was
to mark the beginnings and ends of properties
speaks to me in the sunlight.

His statement, etched in stone, until the last days of London,
clearly show the sole proprietor. 
"Half the Thickness of This Wall is in Paddington Parish" 
How exact the English were then, which they are not now.
How comforting was the Georgian mind for details.

1806, 1826, 1866, 1886, 1906, 1966, 2006, 2012
His voice clears the centuries with clear early 19th century
feet and inches. Does Paddington Parish really care about
half a thickness of wall? Taxes? Wall maintenance? Sole proprietor
of a closed alleyway which no one sees

Except me and a robin, clearly not interested in the mind of 
this maker. But, I am. Wondering at the great interests of
the new industrial world breaking into new views of walls
and ownership across England, those satanic mills
conquering small alleyways and arches.

There is still conquest in these words, an old lettering
a new idea of propriete mocked much later by Dickens,
who most likely walked this way at least once or twice.
Who knows? The footsteps of the past leading me, as 
I stare at a wall separating sole from soul.

My ideas are elsewhere, but the clerk's words ring out
reminding me of the little world I am leaving for awhile, 
a world I shall not miss that much, or at least that is
what I think today, listening to the cheeky robin
mocking the past and reminding me that even

The birds of the air have nests. I know Who is in charge.

Eden and Gethsemane Part Four

The Pope Emeritus in the mentioned book shares an important insight bringing Eden and Gethsemane together.

In the Agony in the Garden, Christ submitted His human will to His Divine will according to both the Pope Emeritus and the origin of the insight, Maximus the Confessor, one of my favorites.

Maximus understood that Christ's natural will submitted to His filial will, His Will as the Second Person of the Blessed Trinity.

Amazing insight that the human will is ordered to the Divine Will.

Adam and Eve were given that order as well, being made in the image and likeness of God, but, as St Bernard writes, keeping the image but losing the likeness, sanctifying grace.

Their human wills were ordered to submit to God's Will. And, they both turned against this created order. They willed disorder. I repeat, they willed disorder.

Christ in the Garden of Gethsemane, I can extrapolate, shows us that we can re-order our wills through His Sacrifice, His Passion, His Redemptive Act.

In other words, what Christ did in the Garden of Gethsemane undid the curse of Adam and Eve, the curse of the disordered will.

Therefore, we, too, with Christ's help and grace, can submit our human wills to God's Will.

"Thy Will be done, " in all things.

The loss of Eden becomes the gain in Gethsemane.

Gethsemane returns the lost grace to the sons and daughters of Adam and Eve with the "Fiat" of Christ.

Luke 22:42Douay-Rheims 

42 Saying: Father, if thou wilt, remove this chalice from me: but yet not my will, but thine be done.
Christ shows us the way back to Eden, to heaven, to perfection by stating "thine be done."
But, for us, in sin and the tendencies to sin, the way back is through the darkness of facing our predominant faults, our habitual venial sins. all which must be cast into the fire of purgation, with Christ standing by us, leading us through the pain to victory of self and sin.
I remind you of the postings on the rectitude of the will.
To be continued....